The 9th | Stray Kids Extra Member AU

❀ 3: The First Elimination ❀

The ten of them stood anxiously on the stage, sweating profusely after their performances. Yejun could tell that Minho's stomach was doing front flips just by the look on his face. She knew she couldn't comfort him, but she still wanted to. She tried her best to comfort him backstage, but it seemed impossible when anyone could get eliminated at any moment. Yejun felt bad, being a part of his team. She was supposed to help Minho improve his skills all around and she failed him. She couldn't help but get a little emotional as they all stood there in silence, patting her tears away with her sleeve. Jisung grabbed one of her hands and smiled at her, only earning a sniffle and a sad smile in return. He gave her hand a squeeze.

Why is he being so quiet? Can't he say the results already? Yejun felt as if she were about to throw up.

"Honestly, Stray Kids came this far," JYP began, all eyes darting towards him, "myself and the company has not intervened in anything."

Oh, god, he's adding drama for the show. That's great, Yejun forced herself not to roll her eyes. Of course one of the most gut-wrenching experiences of their lives was being dramatized for television. Welcome to JYP, I guess.

"We entrusted your leader Chan, but from now on, you have to meet the company's criterias," JYP continued. Chan bit the inside of his cheek, not able to make eye contact with anyone. "The member who I feel might become a burden to the whole team...."

Yejun secretly scoffed at his words. A burden? None of them were a burden. They were all unique, and could all help the team in their own separate ways. Hyerin's thoughts were overwhelmingly loud as JYP, once again, paused for dramatic effect.

"Sorry but, I cannot not eliminate him. I hope you understand."

Just fucking say it already.

"...Minho."

Yejun's throat felt like the Sahara desert as she held back a sob. The lump in her throat only grew more and more as the seconds passed. She could've prevented this. She could've stopped Minho from getting eliminated. She could've helped him, but she didn't try hard enough. She failed Minho and he was being kicked out of the group because of her.

"Minho, you weren't lacking, your training period was just short," Minho nodded at JYP's words. "You all worked hard for today's mission. I hope you can do your best to comfort Minho. You worked hard." And, just like that, JYP walked out of the performance room.

Yejun finally let her tears fall, instantly covering her face to hide from the others. All the members gathered around Minho, tears falling from their faces. Yejun was the first to hug him, crying into his shoulder. Minho gripped her tight, trying to stop his own tears from falling as well.

"Don't cry, Yejun-ah, it'll be okay," Minho rubbed her back, looking up at the ceiling to stop the tears that were threatening to fall any moment.

"I'm so sorry," Yejun cried out between sobs.

"You have no reason to apologize, it's not your fault," Minho kissed the side of her head, then pulled away, only to see other members crying as well. Felix was standing next to him, his hands shakey as he wiped his tears away. "Don't cry," Minho said sweetly to everyone.

"Why'd you mess up the lyrics?" Chan joked, pulling Minho into another hug.

"I'm sorry," Minho hugged back.

"Don't apologize, I'm the one that should be sorry," Chan sniffled, gripping onto Minho tightly. With those words, Minho couldn't help but let his own tears fall.

Jisung walked over to Yejun, who was in shambles, and gave her a big hug. She quickly hugged back, once again letting her sobs out onto someone's shoulder. She had already lost one family back in Sixteen, and now, because of her, this family was beginning to fall apart as well. Her cries were never-ending and she couldn't face anyone else. She was the reason for Minho's downfall. It was entirely her fault. She could have trained him for a few extra hours every day. She could've helped.

Yejun couldn't make eye contact with Minho as he left the stage. She felt as if he hated her for what she did, even though that was very far from the truth. Before Minho left, he turned towards the group, catching everyone's attention.

"Do well, everyone. I'll be rooting for Stray Kids until the very end," Minho smiled sadly at the group before turning back around and leaving.

~~

It was quiet at the dorms. No one could speak, no one wanted to speak. Even though only one out of ten people left, the rooms felt empty. They never felt the same. Yejun couldn't even step into her room, which she had shared with Minho, Changbin, and Jeongin.

She was the only one sitting in the living room, her knees against her chest as she appeared to be deep in thought. It was one of those moments when nothing feels real. Where you haven't quite accepted reality, yet, and your brain is still processing things. She opened her phone, thinking about watching some sort of video or maybe even calling Sana to help cheer her up. When she turned her phone on, though, she saw the background. It was a picture of her and the other nine members making a heart. Yejun's heart dropped once again and she felt tears begin to form in her eyes.

To avoid having yet another breakdown on camera, Yejun quickly walked to the bathroom. She opened the door and swiftly closed it behind her before finally feeling safe to break down. Yejun slid down the wall, a hand over her mouth to muffle her sobs. She was trembling. She had ruined so many people's lives with her mistakes, including her own. She felt herself begin to lose control of her own breathing.

Minho hates me now. He hates me. Minho hates me, Yejun repeated in her head, her uneven breathing becoming more and more rapid by the second. She continued to cover her mouth, though. She didn't want to ruin everybody else's days more than she already did. Her long hair caused her to become very sweaty very quickly, and her bangs were now stuck to her forehead.

Knock knock

"Yejun, is everything alright in there? I'm coming in," Changbin's voice was sweet.

Yejun wanted to tell him that everything was fine, but her staggered breath wouldn't let her. Her lungs burned too badly, as if she had ran three marathons. She closed her eyes, hitting herself in the head in an attempt to make herself stop before Changbin could see her. She was unsuccessful, keeping her eyes closed as she heard Changbin quietly gasp.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Changbin asked, crouching down to her level. Yejun kept her eyes shut, still not able to respond. "That's okay, you don't have to respond. I can leave you alone-"

Yejun grabbed his arm before he could get up, stopping him from leaving her. Changbin looked back down at her and the teary-eyed girl was looking back up at him, both of her eyes completely bloodshot from the tears. She shook her head, making eye contact to help her breathing get back under control.

"Please, please don't leave," Yejun managed to get out. Changbin nodded and sat next to her, pulling her into a side hug. "It's my fault, y'know."

"What?" Changbin looked down at her, a confused look on his face.

"Minho's gone because of me. I didn't help him enough," Yejun's own words caused more tears to fall rapidly down her face. Changbin wiped them off with his sleeve and shook his head.

"It's no one's fault, Yejun. He got nervous out there and forgot the lyrics. Unfortunately, that's enough to get him out," Changbin rubbed her arm soothingly.

"It's so dumb, Changbin," Yejun whimpered, wiping her eyes once again. "This whole thing is so dumb. All of it. It's exploiting our emotions and our hard work and our everything for viewers. It's all bullshit."

"Yeah, I know. I can't even imagine how you feel right now. Everyone here can barely take it for the first time, I couldn't imagine having to do two survival shows," Changbin spoke without thinking, which helped calm the girl. "You're ten times stronger than all of us."

"That's not true, but thank you for everything, anyway," Yejun looked up at him, smiling.

"Anytime," Changbin smiled back at her. "Now, why don't you come hang out with us in our room? We miss you."