Resonant

Chapter 28

Zale

Spring break ended too soon. Fen took Astrea back to her dorm room, then took us to my living room. It was strange being back here after so long. This used to be my haven away from court, the fulfillment of a dream I had of living independently from my destiny.

Now, it didn't fit quite right anymore. Having finally returned to my home, it was more obvious how un-homelike this place felt. I belonged with my people, under the sea. I had to prepare for my lessons tomorrow, but I couldn't think about mitosis or meiosis. I had so many more pressing things to be thinking about. Fen, my screwy magic, my upcoming coronation. Pick whichever. And that wasn't even getting into my siblings' problems. It seemed a little absurd to be worrying about my job teaching high school in the midst of all that.

"Well, I guess I'll see you tomorrow?" Fen said sadly. He held my right hand in both of his and was tracing patterns over my palm with his fingers while he avoided my gaze.

"Or you could stay here," I offered.

Fen smiled at that. "Okay! I just need to grab my phone charger." He dropped my hand and disappeared before I could stay another word. Seconds later, he reappeared with a black cord dangling from his hand.

Needing no further invitation, Fen got his phone charging and settled onto the couch, where he fixed me with an expectant smile.

"Well, aren't you going to sit down?" he said when he must have decided I was taking too long.

I really should be planning my lesson.

Or researching why my magic was still so unreliable.

But something had happened between myself and Fen over break. I felt closer to him. Less willing to be apart. I just... I needed him in a way that made me uncomfortable, because I had never needed anyone like this before.

I knew with chilling certainty that I never would again.

So instead of attending to any of the items on my to-do list, I smiled back at Fen and sat down next to him, a little bit apart so I could have the satisfaction of him sliding over to settle himself against me. When he did just that, I pressed a kiss to his forehead.

"This is nice," Fen said softly.

"It is," I agreed. My heart pounded in my chest as a question rose up, one that would probably shatter the peace we'd found. But we had to talk about it. "Fen?"

"Yeah?"

"Will you move in with me after the semester ends?"

My heart beat twenty-six times before Fen answered. "I don't know."

"Why?" It was a relief to finally ask, since I had been wondering about his answer for a while now.

Fen bit at his lip until I gently pulled it out from between his teeth with my thumb. "I guess it's mostly that I don't know what it would mean for me. For... us."

I really shouldn't move someone into the castle with me without us having a formal engagement, but I was past the point of caring. For me, it was Fen or it was no one. This wouldn't have any impact on our relationship, but it would impact how it was perceived. It was all well and good to announce my intent to marry someone. It would become real to my people when he took his place by my side.

But I didn't want to put all that on Fen, not now. "It doesn't mean anything, Fen, except that we'd be living together."

"Yeah, but wouldn't I need to act and dress a certain way? And go to meetings or events or whatever?"

"Is that what's had you so worried?" I asked.

"Maybe a little," he hedged. But I could feel his nerves through the bond we shared, and they weren't little.