Red Moon Rising

26. rift

Chapter Song: Running With The Wolves - AURORA

XX

When Isaac lends me his phone that evening, Tasha's voice is tight and wary on the other end.

"You're not being honest with me," she says, and she's right.

"What makes you say that?"

"You won't tell me what happened to your phone, and you won't let me call this number back."

"It's my friend's phone—I just don't want to impose on him."

"A guy? Are you staying with a guy, Layla?"

"I didn't say that. Am I imagining a judgmental tone or are you seriously scolding me right now?"

"It's barely over a month since—"

"Uh no, we're not doing this. My life choices are not up for discussion at the moment. But you're welcome to talk to me about anything else."

I don't expect the defensiveness in my own tone, and maybe Tasha doesn't either. She's quiet on the other end, and then she sighs.

"I think you should come home."

"What?" My heart drops into my stomach. I didn't expect to hear those words from Tasha, of all people. Maybe it's because dad won't talk to me anymore, maybe he's trying to get to me through her. He says it's too painful now, that it feels like I've abandoned them out of stubbornness, especially since Cam has returned. And maybe he's right—but why do I have to cave to this? And why would Tasha, who has been on my side since the beginning, change her mind now?

"You're going to get hurt, and for no good reason. Cam's gone, Layla..."

"I love you, Tasha, I really do, but we're not going to talk about Cam."

"Just give your match a try, and if you hate him you can leave him."

I sink onto the edge of the bed and suck in a breath. There is nothing to say to her right now. There's no one else on my side. Why is everyone so determined that I should crawl back to Jackson fucking Courtland? The bedroom door opens and Isaac returns bearing two bottles of wine, and I'm overcome by the urge to hang up on Tasha, something I've never done in my life.

"I'm not going to do that. I appreciate what you're saying, but you've got to respect where I'm coming from too."

"If I think you're making the wrong decision, wouldn't you want me to tell you that? Isn't that the kind of relationship we have?"

"I think you've been talking to dad too much and that you think you know things that you don't."

"I know you, Layla."

"Yeah, well, maybe you don't know me as well as you think. Maybe whatever idea you had in your head has been challenged by the fact that I'm not obeying a handful of wolves who claim they talk to gods."

"I'm not saying this because of the council, I'm saying this because I don't want to see you get hurt."

"Well it already happened! Where do you get off lecturing me?"

"I'm not getting off, Layla, come on. I'm just trying to care about you."

"Then reel it in, because you're overstepping." The words bite me, too, and I sigh at the silence on the other end. "I'm sorry, Tasha, that's not what I meant. But you don't understand this situation. I just...I need you on my side, okay?"

Her voice is watery, and she clears her throat. "I'm on your side. That's why I'm asking you to come home."

"I can't do that, Tash, I just can't." I know that Isaac can hear me as he settles onto the bed next to me and slips a hand over my knee. "I love you, okay? But I need to go."

"Layla, wait! Can't we talk about this more?"

"I'm not changing my mind. I'll call again soon—give dad my love."

"Layla—okay. I love you too."

I end the call despite the pit in my stomach at the way her voice sounded so tired, so much like my dad's. It hurts to disappoint all of the people I care about. It hurts to know that, somewhere deep inside, I know the way I've spoken to her will force a necessary distance between us, at least for awhile. I hand the phone back to Isaac and he settles closer to me on the mattress, pulling me onto his lap.

"You good?"

"Tired." She's my little sister. If I drive her away then I have no one left.

"You don't have to talk to them, you know."

"They're my family. My sister is the only person who even wants to talk to me anymore." Maybe it would be easier if they all gave up on me anyway.

"She's trying to convince you to go back?"

"Yeah."

"It's good they don't know you're here. You wouldn't be the first wolf to be dragged back to a pack after disobeying the elders."

I laugh, though there's no humor in it. "I don't think my family would do that."

"Sometimes it isn't up to the family. If this guy you're matched with decides he wants to retrieve you, any elder would be on his side."

I didn't think of that. But then, I don't think Courtland would be bothered to travel into rural Minnesota to find me, even if he knew where I was. "I'm pretty sure he hates me, anyway."

"All the more reason to bring you back. It's not like he can just find a new match, you know."

I shiver at the way Isaac is staring at me, like he knows too well the disadvantage that I would be at if Jackson decided that he wanted me. He may be an asshole, but I don't think Jackson is kidnapper material. And either way, I can always run.

"Listen," he says slowly, brushing my hair away from my neck to plant a kiss there. "Just forget about them for awhile, okay? I've got you."

Those words, I've got you, do something terrible to me, to my resolve. "I don't want to just leave it all behind."

"You already did. And it sounds like they're forcing your hand. Don't you want to start over?"

"Maybe." Not without dad and Tasha. Not without my pack. But maybe they're ready to move on, with or without me. Maybe that's really what Tasha was trying to tell me.

"So drink some wine with me, and start over." He presses a bottle into my hands along with an opener and wraps his arms around my waist. It's hard to remove the cork with his lips brushing against my neck, and when I've opened the wine he lets me take a long swig from the bottle before taking a drink himself. "To new beginnings," he says, and his fingers tighten into me.

"Cheers," I whisper. I've already decided to lose myself in the wine that Isaac brought tonight. I've already decided to lose myself in him. If my family wants to force my hand, then fine. I have nothing to prove, and nothing to live for except this moment and the next. And in this moment, I'm choosing Isaac and the red wine on his tongue and the solidity of his body against mine. Because at the end of the day, I will fall asleep knowing that my decisions have brought me here—not a curse, not obligation, not fate.