Starboy

Chapter 68: Discover

Today we have a shopping goal: to find a dress for my dad's wedding... in two weeks! Life does not like to give me breaks because everything always happens at once. It's ironic, too. While my dad is getting married and his life is coming together, Benji's dad's life is falling apart. It feels wrong to be celebrating but I can't expect my dad to postpone his wedding.

I went shopping for a dress the same day I ran into Miles but I couldn't find anything. After seeing him, my mind was so clouded that I ended my shopping day right then and there. I didn't tell Benji but I cried on the subway ride home. I just hate when I lose good people in my life. I know Miles said we'd remain friends but I know that isn't true.

"What about this one?" I hold up a pretty pink dress up to myself, asking for Hellen's opinion.

Her eyes are on her phone and she's laughing at whatever text she just received.

"Hellen?" I call out to her and she finally looks up.

"Sorry," she says, a smile still on her face from whatever she was laughing at. "What's up?"

"You aren't shopping, you're texting," I say disapprovingly. "Don't you want to find something for the wedding?"

"Yes but not here." She looks around and shakes her head. "I mean, look at the stuff this place sells." She picks up a few items and gags. "This is so not for me. I'm not a pink kind of girl, you know this. I don't like dresses."

"Me neither!" I say. "But it's my dad's wedding, I can't wear jeans."

"Please, these days you wear nothing but skirts and dresses. Benji has changed your style dramatically. I'm all alone in this hatred for dresses."

"You are not alone," I assure her. "After this, we can go someplace else, okay? Someplace that sells the kind of clothes that you want to wear." I yank out a blue dress from the rack and hold it against myself. "What about this one?"

"It's nice," she says, rolling her eyes. "Try it on."

I slip into the beautiful blue dress in the dressing room, admiring it in the mirror. The dress is dark blue, just like my eyes. It's long, it almost reaches down to my ankles. It's also sleeveless, with an elegant v-neck collar. I don't even come out to show Hellen, I just buy it.

We go to another store, as Hellen's request, and she tries on a suit. Hellen is tall, slim and beautiful. She has the perfect model-type body for a suit. Then there's me, who would like to wear a suit but it doesn't fit me as well. My legs are a bit stubby and I'm not nearly as tall enough to rock one.

Happy with our shopping trip, I head back home. I am more tired than usual these days, every little thing takes up my energy. From going to school, my internship, my job, and you know... having sex, I am completely drained. I realize I should probably drop one of the things on my crazy schedule. School? Not a chance. Work? I need the money. Sex? Absolutely. Not.

I guess I should quit the internship.

"I bought a dress!" I squeal as I walk into the apartment, carrying the bag with me as I approach the couch where Benji is sitting. His computer is over his lap and he's typing away on an essay.

"You did?" He's smiling. "Let's see." He reaches out to grab the bag from me, and I pull it away.

"Uh uh," I say. "You can see it on the wedding day."

"You realize we aren't the ones getting married, don't you?" He smirks. "Why can't I see it?" He frowns.

"Because every time I've worn a dress to an event, you've been the one who picked it out for me. This time, I picked it out and I don't want you seeing it yet."