Starboy

Chapter 17: I'm Next

Benji grabs my hand as we enter the door. I smile at him, and he smiles back. "I promise I won't ditch you this time," he says to me.  

"You better not," I joke. "I don't know if I could survive that all again."

Shawn notices Benji and he heads toward us, already smiling. "Starboy, my man!" He shouts as they exchange a bro hug. "So glad you made it. And you too..." he trails off, forgetting my name.

"Brandy," I say, feeling rather unmemorable.

"Right, right," he nods his head. "Sorry 'bout that."  

"Shawn, what's going on? What was so urgent that I needed to be here right now?" Benji asks.

"This," he answers, looking around the room. "We can't have a party without star-fucking-boy!"

"Seriously, Shawn?" He half laughs.

"No wasting time, man. Let's go do shots. Woo!" He shouts once again and I shudder at his loud volume. "You too, Brandy."   

"I'm sorry," Benji apologizes to me. "I didn't know this is what he wanted me here for."

"I did," I say. "It's okay, Benji," I say, placing my hand on his face. "Let's just... go do shots?"

"Shots? Really? You?" He teases me, knowing I'm not a huge drinker.

I've only ever been drunk once before. I've had other drinks in the meantime, but I always end up pouring it down the sink at the end of the night. I just don't particularly like alcohol. I don't understand what the hype with it is. It tastes awful, it gives you a mean headache and hangover, and you make terrible decisions. And all for what? An hour of bliss? 

"I can be fun," I try to convince him.

"I never said you couldn't be," he laughs. "The best thing about you is that you're fun without alcohol," he says. "Me? And everyone else here? They need alcohol to be fun." 

"You're fun without alcohol," I reply. "In fact, I think I like sober Benji a lot more than drunk Benji."

"You'd be the first," he mutters. 

We follow Shawn out into the backyard where there are a ton of drunk young adults falling over, playing beer pong and smoking. I start to get these flashbacks of going to parties with Benji when we were in high school.

Believe it or not, Benji's relationship with alcohol and drugs was actually worse a few years ago. I remember there was a party in tenth grade at one of Benji's friends and he had so much to drink, he passed out, and we had to call 9-11. He was barely breathing and everyone was terrified he was going to die -- I was terrified. He had a smooth recovery, but a touch of alcohol poisoning. Okay, more than a touch, but the important thing is that he ended up fine.  

Of course, that never stopped him from drinking. He took it easy for a while after that, but soon later he was back to being the life, and sometimes even the death, of the party.

"Hey, everyone!" Shawn announces as he sees us. "Starboy is in the motherfucking house!"

Everyone cheers and smiles at us -- well, at him, and I stand there awkwardly. 

I can't help but notice all of the beautiful girls checking Benji out and continuously smiling at him. I feel slightly insecure with all of the experienced college girls looking at him, making me want to be just as good as them. 

"I'm next," I say, letting go of Benji's hand. I stand next to Shawn where all of the shot glasses are and brace myself.

"Damn, Brandy. Let's see what you got." Shawn says to me.