Cinnamon Goes Best

Chapter 10 - Son of a Bitch!

"What are you doing here?" Dean asked angrily "I'm here to visit my favourite daughter" his dad started laughing only to be interupted by his own drunk hiccups "well she isn't here so you can go now" Dean moved to shut the door but John's hand caught it "now come on Deanna, i' that any way to treat your pa?" John stumbled into the motel room looking around

"I see you found someone to whore around with" he looked disgusted at Castiel who was now sitting on the edge of the bed staring at Dean scared-like as John looked down at him

"Just get the fuck out" Dean tightened his fists "that isn't very lady like of you DeDe" John smiled smugly at him "shut the hell up" "come on Deanna, didn't you miss me?" John almost fell as he attempted to step towards Dean

"No, I didn't" Dean said through clenched teeth, green eyes filled with anger "now leave" "why? So you can get fucked by this little twink" John smiled looking down at Castiel again "don't you look at him" Dean stood in between Castiel and his father "leave. Now." "Whatever you say birthday girl" John pulled Dean into his strong and disgusting arms and whispered in his ear "but don't think I won't be back for you Deanna" and with that John left the small motel room

Once the door shut Dean collapsed into Castiel's arms "shhh, you're okay" Castiel stroked Dean's hair as his tears rolled off his face and onto the bed, barely able to catch his breath, he had never seemed so small

"I hate that son of a bitch!" Dean yelled out, his hand turning white from gripping Castiel's arm, face covered in tears "he's gone Dean, you're okay now" Castiel tried to calm him but no matter what he did, Dean continued to cry and scream out curse words, completely breaking Castiel's heart

Within the hour Dean had stopped his crying "Dean? Honey, are you alright?" Castiel looked down, Dean had lost his grip on his arm, there were no more tears leaving his eyes, there was no movement at all other than his slow breaths "it's late, you should get some rest" Castiel carefully moves Dean off of him, laying him on the bed

Castiel grabbed sweatpants and a t shirt from one of the dresser drawers, Dean slowly sat up but he still didn't speak
Castiel gently pulled off Dean's plaid shirt, exposing the scars on his arms, but when he attempted to remove his shirt, Dean grabbed his arm "you don't deserve this Castiel" "Dean, you have been through so much, I understand" "except you don't" Dean glanced up at Castiel but immediately looked back down, his words more intense sounding than he intended them to be

"Dean, I'm sorry but you aren't getting rid of me that easily" Castiel kneeled down to get a better look at Dean's face "I love you Dean Winchester, let me help you" he slowly eased into touching Dean's arm, not wanting to make him too uncomfortable

"Thank you, but I can dress myself" Dean slightly smirked at Castiel "do you want me to turn around?" Castiel asked "yes please" Dean whispered softly, a slight whimper present in his voice

So that's what Castiel did, he turned the other way, waiting for Dean to finish getting dressed, Castiel understood, his dad just deadnamed him and used the wrong pronouns, not to mention all of the trauma, of course Dean would be feeling self conscious right now

"Thank you Castiel" Dean smiled at his boyfriend, his green eyes still sad "anything for you" Castiel placed a gentle kiss on Dean's cheek

Sam was staying at Bobby's for the night, so the two just cuddled and watched The Best Of Me, both crying by the end of it, after the movie was finished, they sat around for a while, listening to music and talking about fate, destiny, a topic brought up by the movie, despite how their night went, Castiel left just before midnight, he didn't want to go but he also didn't want Dean to become more upset from him staying

"I think that recipe from this morning is the one that I'm going to go with from now on" Castiel smiled as he pulled on his trenchcoat "it did taste really good, way better than heaven" Dean yawned, stretched out in the bed, looking exhausted but a lot better than he did a few hours ago, "I will have your coffee ready first thing in the morning" Castiel leaned down to kiss him, Dean gave Castiel a signature wink as he walked out the door

"I love you Castiel" "I love you too Dean"

January 25

It was early in the morning, almost too early, Castiel readied that first cup of cinnamon coffee, making sure everything was perfect when the doorbell chimed, he looked up and smiled at Sam

"Good morning Sam" "morning Cas, you ready for today?" "I think so" Castiel nervously fiddled with a little black bracelet on his wrist "it's going to be fine, I promise" Sam reassured Castiel, giving him a smile
"I have to get to school so can I get a large coffee?" Sam raised his eyebrows "here you go" he slid a freshly poured cup of steaming hot, cinnamon coffee over to Sam who took a sip "that's so good Cas" Sam looked like he was tasting something better than heaven

"Do you think he would have liked it?" Castiel looked up at Sam with big, bright, hopeful blue eyes "I think he would have loved it" Sam smiled contently

It was two years since they lost Dean...he didn't know it then but after Castiel left that little motel room, Dean paced around the room, even left to go on a late night drive listening to all of his favourite song, but by the time morning came around, he had made his decision and chose to end his life.

It was a prominent part of Castiel's life for quite a while but now, tucked away somewhere in a drawer in Castiel's apartment is a letter, a letter that gets read at least once a month, a letter that was possibly the last thing Dean did before he left this world

Dear Blue Eyed Angel,

I never wanted to leave you but I couldn't stand this world anymore,
I am just a broken piece of a complicated puzzle, the one that gets the whole puzzle thrown into the trash just because it wasn't strong enough,
I know we have only known each other for a few months but you need to know that the time I spent with you was the best thing that ever happened to me, I truly believe that this all has a greater meaning for both you and I,
I wouldn't call it destiny but you have an amazing future ahead of you, one with lots and lots of cinnamon, I just know it,
Don't let your blue eyes lose their shine my angel, promise yourself that you will always keep fighting, fighting for what's right, for what YOU want in YOUR life,
You are strong, the strongest man I have ever met, you have the power to change your story, to write your name in the stars, to do whatever the hell you want,
Because you deserve the world and so much more,
I love you Castiel James Novak,

Sincerely,
your Green Eyed Huckleberry,
Dean Winchester

So Castiel did just that, he wrote his own story, he bought his very own cafe using the money that he had saved up over the years, a plan that Dean always encouraged him to go through with, and used the rest of that money to help Sam through college so that he can become a lawyer one day and make Dean proud. Even more proud than he already was if that's even possible

"I'll see you after school" Sam smiled and walked out with a wave, hopping into the familiar black, 67 Chevy Impala, Castiel went to the door and flipped the open sign, he peeked outside just to be sure everything was absolutely perfect and there it was, the sign hanging over the door reading the name of his business, a name that meant everything to him because it was some of the first words he ever said to a mysterious green eyed man named Dean Winchester,

Cinnamon Goes Best