Love me, London

forty-three

A rush of guilt struck through me as I was sitting in a small but almost-crowded café. From twelve to one, it was usually the busiest hour of the day. People were coming in and out. Students were having their lunches and it didn't help with the place located just right in between two university campus. There was barely any room to breath or let alone move. Luckily, I came early and managed to secure one of the very last two tables available at the time. I wasn't too happy with the spot though. It was too far in the corner and too isolated. But it was either this table or the one outside in front, fully exposed to the public eyes. I didn't want to risk getting caught.

A faint Ding sound rung from the bell above the door to the café, signaling a new customer. I pondered on that noise for about a second before finally looked up.

While staring, I gulped a mouthful. My heart began to dance a different beat as my eyes found him. Less than steps he took and he was standing in front of me. His talk frame towered my sitting-down figure.

"Hey." I blinked hardly.

A small smile snuck across his face as he took a seat across from me at our table.

"Hey." He greeted me back. His voice though, it sounded much more casual and relax compared to mine.

Sliding a steaming cup of coffee his way, I forced out a smile while enduring uncomfortable anxiety. I cleared my throat and spoke to him plainly.

"Black coffee. No sugar." I noted and he nodded his head in approval. Taking the mug from my hand, he snuck a quick glance down, studying its content as it swirled in a circular motion before looked up.

"It's been a while." He trailed off, still smiling.

Normally, I would find that quality disturbing in some people. Like I could never understand how one could smile so much, especially when there was absolutely no reason to at all and they still smiled. But with Xavier, his smile was something else. It was sincere. Genuine. And not to mention, had always seemed to make me feel better.

Then suddenly, as if he could hear my thought, his smile faded. It was being replaced with a strain— almost close to a stressing-out kind of look.

"What's up?" He asked. His instant change of tone catching me off guard and I tried not to sway.

"Nothing." I grinned dryly. Holding a cup of hot chocolate to my lips, I took a quick sip and let the awkward air in between us rendered for another moment.

I needed time to think. Either, I played this whole plan off smartly, or I ended up not only messing everything up for myself but the others too.

And by the others, I mean him. Liam.

"So..." I shrugged my shoulders lightly while placing down the cup in my hand, "What've you been up to lately?" I asked, formally. My question stunned him a little bit but he just played it off.

"Nothing much." He said then gave me a once-over and looked ready to spring up from his spot any moment now, "Are we still going to pick up your stuffs from Luciano's place or no?"

I nodded, "Yes, we're. Just not right now."

"Oh.." He blinked hard, "Okay.."