Yeosang x Ateez

Stay {TW}

Do you feel like memories slip away?

That they just vanish and never return?

Do you remember every part of the one you love, every part of you family, every part of your friends?

Is it normal to forget how they laughed, cried, smiled and joked around?

Is it hard to get those memories back?

What if you watched those same people fall apart in front of you?

Without having any way to save them?

Is that a world we live in?

Saving ourselves, saving our own dignity

Is it wrong to feel regret, remorse and abandonment when your at fault?

Is it stupid to pray to a non existent god for those same people to smile again, to be happy again?

Because Yeosang would do anything to save them again.

Wooyoung

That day, the one ingrained in his mind was the start of the guilt. During that day Yeosang and Wooyoung were walking home from their work in a central cafe, one that wasn't too big nor too small. It was their pay day and the day after was a rare day off so they planned to go shopping and indulge themselves.

The alleyway they needed to head down to reach their home was as dark as always, always a strange dripping sound and thuds. Used to it they don't question the noises and continue as normal. They stepped into that dark alleyway and walked towards their home just opposite it and was lit well enough that they could see it clearly through the darkness. Seonghwa must be home.

The alleyway was long, thin and full of turns leading into other alleys. Each as dark as the other and just as intimidating. If only he listened to the gut feeling, the same feeling that settled the moment he stepped into the cramped space. But he was stupid. He felt himself be grabbed from behind, a hand over his mouth and another trapping his arms, he tried to call out to Wooyoung but watched as his best friend was slammed against a wall and winded. He watched his best friend, his other half be thrown to the floor and struggling to fight the man atop him. He watched the clothes covering Wooyoungs body be torn away and the man atop getting handsy. He couldn't do anything still trapped as he watched his best friend be raped. He tried to fit, biting and kicking but the man was too strong. He stared at his partner in crimes eyes as they flooded with tears.

He watched the boy silently call out for help. He tried everything to break from the man's hold but nothing work. He watched as his friends eyes closed as a knife was plunged into his head. The sickening sound of blood, bone and flesh, the frustration at the laughs and lack of energy to fight more. He let himself be treated the same way. He felt useless when the men just walked away not finishing him off. He crawled pitifully to Wooyoungs body, he cradled the cold frame and sobbed deeply, ignoring the pain, the fluids, the rain.

The world was cruel, it tore away what he loved and he resented it but he was broken. Every night after he returned home and broke the news to seonghwa, who broke down called the cops and mortician, the same one who arranged the boys funeral, he woke up remembering the last moments of the one he loved. The screams, the sobs, the images of that day taunted him, drove him crazy.

He became a shell of himself but he tried to cheer up, Wooyoung wouldn't want him to destroy himself.

Hongjoong

The following weeks, his friends tried everything to regain the once playful Yeosang but it was hard. He faked his emotions, playing along with the others, having fun and smiling. But they all could see that the man was silently crying and mourning for his friend.