T'was Arranged

♆Ignobilis♆

I was born in a big grey cloud,
Screaming out a love song,
All the broken chords,
And unnamed cries,
What a place to come from,
I wish to remain nameless."
~ Remain Nameless, Florence + The Machine

L o g a n

I wish I could say I felt bad about playing a role in the demise of Cameron and Sage's "relationship".

When Celine pulled me out of the kitchen and into the hallway, she didn't take one step away from the entrance before pulling me against a nearby wall. I attempted to voice my confusion but the woman clamped a hand over my mouth and gave me a stern glare. Don't speak, she mouthed, pointing to one of her ears. She then directed her attention toward the kitchen. I rolled my eyes at her immaturity, but nonetheless settled myself to listen in on the private conversation ensuing between my wife and my ex-lover's brother.

"Really, I should be thanking you for these past few months," I could hear Sage compliment Cameron. "You've been...a rock for me. Ever since I met you, you've been so good to me."

...And right about there is where I chose to tune out. I don't give a fuck about how she feels for the douchebag and probably never will.

Anger I wasn't surprised of swelled up in my chest at her words. Just how good had he been to her? Had they...What if they'd had sex? I closed my eyes to shut the sight of his hands on her body out of my head, but it was suddenly permanently imprinted into my subconscious. The more she sang his praises, the worse the image became. I clenched my fists. The unnecessary rage from the night before was there again, the blood in my veins sizzling just underneath my skin. She probably has laid down for him, moaned for him, while you were out being a coward. Of course they've had sex, my mind taunted.

I also wish I could say I wasn't immensely jealous of Celine's twin. But I'm not going to. I'm tired of denying how I feel, tired of letting my pride and depression keep me from experiencing the good in my life. Sage could be a part of the good. Sage was a part of the good. Maybe if I had treated her differently before, if my heart had been more open to the thought of us when we got married and when she was hurting the most, this darkness wouldn't have found its way into rooting itself into both of us. We could've stopped Reid. We could've been happy.

I'm no longer afraid to say I have feelings for Sage. I just wish she'd admit it to herself as well.

I was about to leave Celine to her teenage snooping when my ears caught the tail-end of their conversation.

"You're lying to me," this time it was the voice of Cameron, "just like you lied to me before about what took you so long to get Logan. You have feelings for him."

My eye twitched at his words. A strange new feeling erupted in my chest, but before I could pin point the emotion, Celine pushed us away from the wall. Together we rushed across the hall to a sitting room.

"Get on the phone with Joseph," She whisper-hissed. When I hesitated she grabbed the phone I'd forgotten I was holding in my left hand and slammed it against my ear. I snatched the phone out from her and pressed the number three for speed dial.

Not long after the kitchen staff returned to make us dinner, Cameron stormed out of the kitchen looking a bit livid. When he reached Celine and I, he refused to make eye contact with me.

"Let's go," He almost growled at his sister.

She looked back at me with a bored expression. Turning back to Cameron, she said, "I'm hungry. Why can't we stay until dinner is ready?"

"Don't act like you don't know why we can't stay, Celine, I know you were listening." He takes the moment to glare at me. I stare at him blankly, crossing my arms over my chest and leaning against a nearby armrest. "We're leaving, now."