Broken Toys - Johanna Mason x fem reader

Chapter 15 - Impatience

Mary was crying. "You've grown too fast. That only clarifies how much you endured."

I pulled her into a hug. "It's alright. I will fight for a life where we can all live safely." As I had promised to Rue.

The next day I got my schedule printed onto my arm. Weird, but I should not be the one to judge. 

My first appointment was breakfast. But I could not help myself and skipped it to go to President Coin. I knocked at her door. "President Coin? It's (f/n)." 

"Come in." 

My request to rescue the captives had only gotten passed on by her assistants. Maybe I could persuade her personally. 

To my surprise she was alone in her office. "Hello, (f/n). Seems like you recovered well", she greeted me. 

Something about her had unsettled me at our first meeting, but I had been too upset to notice what it had been. Now I knew. I could not read her. Over the years I had observed the people around me. I had needed to do it to survive, both in district 11 and in the arena. Hence I had gotten excellent at reading and predicting other people. But Coin did not show any emotions, neither through her voice nor her body language. 

"Though you already deviated from your schedule", she added. 

I did not like her change of topic. "I did not mean to be rude or ungrateful, but I had to come here. Please, you have to rescue the captives. I ..." 

She raised her hand signaling me to stop talking. 

"Don't get me wrong. If I could I would rescue them right away. But It's not that simple. We don't know enough about their situation. We might lose many soldiers and still not be able to save them. The risks and probability of failure are too high. Furthermore, Heavensbee can't contact his allies at the Capitol. So, we don't even know where the captives are held", she resonated. 

I clenched my hands into fists, feeling my fingers getting wet again. Alhough I was already wearing a bandage around my hand, I still managed to reopen the cut on my palm whenever I suppressed my emotions. It had not been able to heal until now. 

"If you hurry, you can still eat breakfast. You have a hard schedule today", she reminded me. 

I could not care less. What was a hard schedule even supposed to mean? Could it get any harder than it was? 

Before I could do something I would regret later, I left the room and went to the canteen. It was strange to be here. I knew literally no one, except Katniss, Haymitch, Finnick and my family. 

Finnick was inside his hospital room, devastated because of Annie. I was also worried about her, but rather due to her mental state. They would not harm her too badly. Johanna and Peeta would have it way worse. 

I could not spot Katniss anywhere either. 

Haymitch was somewhere underground, having to become sober. 

My family had another breakfast time than me. 

So I was on my own. Reluctantly I gulped down my breakfast and followed my schedule. 

The first few hours were strategize sessions. Like a mentor needed to be taught in strategizing. If I did not know how to strategize with my skills, how would I still be alive after two Hunger Games? Ridiculous! I was able to answer every question without even listening, impressing the other students and the instructor. It did not matter. It was a waste of time. I should rather learn something useful! I lacked physical, fighting skills. 

In the break I hurried through the floor and met Heavensbee. At least my luck had not left me completely, though it seemed wrong to say that in the context of meeting the gamemaster of my own games.