it's you, it's always been you

chapter 4

"I can't wait to see you in that adorable band geek outfit tonight," Sam teased Deena.

Their hands were still connected and laying on Deena's lap. Deena's thumb slowly ran back and forth over the back of Sam's hand, which made Sam blush even deeper.

Deena threw a small fry at Sam as she laughed.

Sam was about to say something but was interrupted by the loud sound of her name being called on the speakers in the cafeteria.

Sam jumped in her chair and took her hand away from Deena's lap, but it immediately missing the warmth of Deena's hand.

She turned around to see Caleb, the guy Sam's mom tried to set her up with a few days before. Her heart started racing as she realized he was in a suit with a bouquet of roses in his hand.

There were two of the other football players behind him. They were both holding a cardboard sign, one read, "Sam" and the other, "Will you go to homecoming with me?"

Sam stood up, too afraid to look at Deena as she did. The whole room was staring at her. She realized he was still talking on the speakers with the microphone as she stood facing him in complete shock.

"What?" Was all she could say in the moment. Sam felt sick to her stomach. Here she was, holding hands with Deena, laughing with her and had just kissed her. And right in front of Deena, a guy was asking her out. She never saw this coming and never wanted this to happen, especially in front of Deena.

But all the eyes were on Sam, and Sam suddenly thought of her mom, and how she would react to her being asked by Caleb.

"Sam Fraser will you go to homecoming with me?" He asked again, a huge smirk on his face.

"Y-Yes."

And as soon as the word left Sam's lips, Deena ran out of the cafeteria.

Caleb wrapped his arms around Sam as he lifted her off the floor. The room clapped for the couple, barely noticing how Deena stormed out. But that's all Sam could think about. The whole room was staring at her, she knew how embarrassing it would be if she said no in the moment.

Sam sat down the flowers on the table, realizing Deena wasn't there anymore.

Sam mumbled something to Caleb about using the bathroom and went to go after Deena down the hallway. At the last second, she saw her with her brown curls turn into the bathroom and Sam ran to the door.

"Deena..." Sam let out as she tried to catch her breath. "I'm so sorry.... I didn't know what to do." Deena turned to face Sam, tears threatening to fall down her face.

A girl came out of the bathroom stalls and walked out as fast as she could with her head down.

"Here's what you fucking do, you don't kiss me then go to homecoming with someone else. Really Sam? Who did you say yes for? You or your mom? How did you think it was going to make me feel?"

Deena was yelling now, her hands were in fists and hot tears rolled down her cheeks. She just watched as the girl she loved was asked out in front of the whole grade. For a moment, Deena hoped, Sam was brave. She saw it that night at her house but Sam said yes, and it broke her. She knew now that Sam was always just going to hurt her. Sam wasn't different. Deena always expected the worse in people, but never Sam. Until now.

Part of Deena was jealous. Actually, Deena was completely jealous. She so badly wanted to be the one with roses and declaring her love for Sam and asking her to homecoming in front of her grade.

"Deena.. I'm so sorry.. I'm sorry. I-I..." Sam didn't know what else to say to Deena. She knew how badly it hurt her and she wished she could take the whole moment back and run away with her down the hallway before he even got the chance to ask Sam.

"Fuck you Sam. I never want to see you again."

Deena kicked a trash can across the floor and went to leave, but Sam stopped her with a hand on her arm. "Deena.. I love you"

"No you don't. You don't know what love is." Deena pulled her arm away, not caring who saw her crying as she walked straight out the doors of the school.

For the first time, she was thankful that her best friends were dealers, and tonight she decided would be the first time she tried drugs, whatever one they wanted to give her, she didn't care. All she wanted to do was to stop feeling all the love she had for Sam and how it was ruined in a matter of minutes.

Sam shrunk to her knees. Tears falling as she hid her face in her hands. She knew how cold Deena could be to other people but she never thought she would see the day Deena would hate her.

She confessed how she truly felt about Deena, trying anything to stop her. In this moment, Sam's heart broke for losing Deena, and it was all her fault. She felt like she deserved the anger and words spewing out of Deena's mouth. But no matter what Deena would say, all she wanted to to was hold her until all her broken pieces were together again. She already missed Deena, and now Deena hated her.

Sam didn't care about the girls coming into the bathroom, she was crying so hard that she could barely breathe.

Suddenly, Sam ran into one of the stalls, throwing up into the toilet. When Sam opened her eyes, she looked horrified at all the blood that she just threw up.

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ty for all the cute little messages about the fic 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 anyways there's still a lot planned and more angst so come back soon for some more funnnnn 😘