Exit

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Ryder's POV:

The exit for Old Orchard is ten miles away. My foot pushes down on the gas. With the thoughts I had rolling around in my mind about Ren, there was no way I would turn around. I needed to make sure once and for all.

My phone rings, a picture of Josh's face popping up on my phone. My guess was that Luke had called him and gave him a warning. After reading Ren's work, I now knew precisely how Josh felt about or use to feel about her. It pissed me off. "Hello?" My voice is clipped.

"Luke told me you are heading to Old Orchard. He won't tell me why, though."

Good. "Okay?"

"You have to be in Portland by nine o'clock tonight for the bachelor party" I can tell it is killing him not knowing what is in Old Orchard and that he is worried I will miss his party.

"I know. Don't worry, I'll make it." Hopefully, I would make it... I click off and think about everything I had read the last two days. I called into work the day after starting her blog, taking a personal day, a rarity in itself; I had stayed up till five in the morning trying to cram as much reading as I could in. Six years were waiting for me to devour each and every word.

I was, without a doubt, a dick. I finally admitted it to myself.

It was easier to be a dick to Ren than try to be her friend or a "nice" roommate.

She was overly attractive; I was also attractive; it was only a matter of time till I got drunk, came home, and tried to sleep with her. I don't think Ren would have gone with it, but it would have changed the dynamic of everything. Or there was a possibility that she would have fallen for my tactics, and then it would be like waking up to a one-night stand for the next eight months.

I hatched my plan: to make it so bad that I would need to find a new roommate; by the end of the month. I thought Ren would be looking for a new apartment, but I was so wrong.

I thought I could keep hating her, coming up with lame, shallow excuses, like her TV volume was too loud at night, or hearing her talk on her phone while she searched for new jobs was annoying. I thought I could make myself hate her until she had lunch for the first time with my family.

Josh had his hand wrapped around Ren's when I stepped through the door; this was his way of flirting with a cute girl. He had taught me this trick when I was in high school; he was a Freshman in college when he had shown me; this was also when I thought Josh was the coolest person in the World.

My mind blazed with anger when I saw Josh's hand on hers. I was more upset that she seemed okay with the contact and wasn't moving away from it. She had known him maybe an hour tops, and she was already trusting him.

The talking never stopped while I was in my room, trying to calm down. I didn't realize then the feeling I had was jealousy. One hundred punch Josh in the face percent jealousy. 

"He is quite a peach of a guy," Ren said, standing at her door.

"I'm very peachy" She shuddered at my voice, and I knew she was still terrified of me. I hated that she had flinched from me two days before; her eyes filled with panic when I had stepped closer to her when all I was thinking was what it would feel like to have her lips on mine.

I sat down for lunch as I listened to the conversation.

It was all annoying small talk until Luke, my youngest brother, talked. He started asking Ren a million questions and would not shut up. Mandy, Josh, and I sat quietly as he kept the conversation going with her. I had learned more about her than I did in the one week she had been rooming with me.

Ren had no clue; what was happening was Earth-shattering.

She didn't know that Luke talked to no one ever outside of his three siblings. He had just started sixth grade but talked to no one; he had zero friends. After what he had gone through with my parents, none of us pushed him to change; we gave him the time he needed. None of us knew the correct amount of time for a twelve-year-old to mourn your dead parents. When Luke was ready, he would be ready. But there was something about Ren that made him start talking a lot.

My eyes kept falling onto Ren's during that first lunch; her hair was pulled into another bun, she was wearing yoga pants and a ratty high school track sweatshirt. I grinned knowing, she hated having the air conditioning on constantly. She wore no makeup, but yet she was the most beautiful person I had ever seen. It didn't help that my little brother was opening up and trusting her.

He smiled at her, and Ren looked around the table, wondering why no one else was talking; she had no clue what a rarity it was.

She had no clue that what was happening was the best thing that had happened to me in the last two years.

She looked at me with her light blue eyes, and I frowned instantly; my life had just gotten a lot harder. Because I knew I could not have these types of feelings for my roommate.

After reading her blog, I now see that she never had a clue that I was instantly hooked from that first day she had walked through the door to my apartment.

That I wanted her, the first time she smiled, looking out the window.

No, she had no clue that I was a jerk because I didn't want to fall for her, the gorgeous, caring person that she was.

She was the only person to call me on being a jackass, but she had never seen that I craved her the whole time.

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