Fallout [The 100]

63

★ M A I A ★

The tavern was crowded as groups of people gathered around paper lanterns to confess their sins. Apparently, it was tradition to write your regrets on strips of cloth and attach them to lanterns. At night, they'd light them and let them float away. It was a nice thought.

Raven had gone upstairs, and Echo had disappeared. Gav had invited Alex to put a ribbon on our lantern, but he'd said his sins wouldn't float and gone outside. Gavril and I sat at a table with a lantern between us. I stared at my strip of fabric wondering what I was going to write down. Across from me, Gav was doing the same.

"Gav," I said quietly. "I'm so sorry." He looked up. "I never apologized. I'm the reason Peter and Ella died. If I had just gone to Polis with the rest of my friends, it never would have happened."

"You heard Kenna; it was gonna happen sometime," he reminded me. "The Shadows couldn't stay neutral forever. If it hadn't been you, it would've been McCreary or Diyoza. I think that would've been worse. At least we got you."

"I am glad I met Cal," I admitted. "I was fucked up, and somehow a complete stranger pulled me out of that when my closest friends couldn't. And I got you and Kenna out of it." After a moment, I added. "And Alex."

Gav gave me a lopsided smile. "Alex is an acquired taste."

I looked down at my strip of fabric and wrote: Pushing my friends away.

"It was my fault anyway." I glanced back up at Gav's words. "If it weren't for me, Ella and Peter would've lived long lives. Ella left everything she'd ever known for me, because I screwed up. If she'd just let me go back to prison, she would have never met Alex or Peter. They would've lived the rest of their lives in Berlin. They never would have joined the House of Shadows."

I shook my head. "You can't blame yourself for that. She was your sister, of course she was going to help you. I don't think she ever regretted it once. I bet Alex doesn't either."

"Maybe not." Gav put his pen to the fabric and wrote. The lantern blocked my view, so I couldn't see, but I had some idea of what he put down. We tied the fabric to the top of the lantern and stepped away from the table.

"How is Alex doing?" I asked, as we headed for the door. "I don't know what to make of him."

Gav nodded. "He's a tough one to crack. But he's handling it the same way he does with everything else. By ignoring it."

"I tried that," I admitted. "It never works as well as you hope."

★★★★

The palace at Sanctum had been utterly transformed from our dinner the night before. The lights were dimmed, and colorful beams cut across the room in time to the music. Speakers rolled out bass and vocals, and the floor could hardly be seen through the smoke pumped in for atmosphere.

It looked like something straight out of a movie. Nothing on the Ark had ever come close to this. Even the comet watching parties were more black tie than black light. The closest we'd ever gotten to having as much fun as the people who filled the dance floor was Unity Day at the dropship.

My cheeks warmed at the memory of Clarke bursting into Bellamy's tent and finding us tangled up in each other. We were so young then. We thought we we'd seen it all, but we'd barely scratched the surface.

At my side Gav cleared his throat and nodded across the room. I couldn't stop the shocked gasp that slipped out of my mouth at the sight. "I guess we know where he ran off to," Gav said with a chuckle. I stared at Alex and Echo locked in an embrace for another moment before a tap on my shoulder distracted me.