Unexpected love / Damiano x Victoria

/ 8 /

This chapter will be written in Damiano's point of view to gain an insight into his feelings and thoughts.

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I stand on the terrace with a cigarette between my fingers. My hands tremble in fear that I will say something wrong that make her disappear from my life forever.

Victoria is a girl I have known for many years, and it hasn't once been like this. We have always been honest with each other and talked about everything, but now it seems that things have changed drastically in just a few days.

I regret what we did last night and I regret hurting her. Leaving Victoria that way wasn't something I wanted, but I had to, to save our friendship.

To be honest, I don't understand her. She was far from drunk and aware of what we were doing. Was she just trapped at the moment? Or is there something more behind it?

Throughout our time as friends, she has never tried anything on me. I'm happy about that, but at the same time it makes it strange that it suddenly happens now. After I've proposed to Giorgia, the love of my life.

But what I did was far above the line. I'm ashamed, so now I have to apologize one more time. The gaze she gave me before I left is set as cast deep in my brain. Damn, I'm an idiot.

The door to the terrace opens and Victoria comes out with careful steps. «Hi»

Her voice is soft and innocent. Big contrast from how it was yesterday. No, I need to focus on the right things.

Victoria's face is limp and her body has a hanging pose. She looks tired. My heart is pounding. She's vulnerable, it's clear, and that's just my fault.

«How are you?», I try to hug her, but she placed a hand on my chest and gently pushes me away. Is she scared of me or something?

«I'm fine»

No, you're not fine.

The cold wind blows over us. Her little body trembles and she struggles to stay warm. Had this been under normal conditions, I would have offered her my jacket, but I stay away this time.

«So do you want to talk about the fact that you ran away from me last night?», Victoria suprises by taking a pack of smoke and a lighter from her pocket. I thought she quit smoking a few years ago.

I think this girl is full of surprises, even the ones you least expect.

«It became too much for me. I couldn't get my thoughts away from Giorgia who was probably at home in Rome waiting for it to be the next day so she could come here and see me», I pause before continuing, «Why tho? Why did you want me to kiss you and fuck you until you can't even walk?»

I look down at her legs that are placed strangely next to each other. I made her feel good and then shit, maybe even used. That's the defenition of a real asshole. Almost like the ones you see in American movies.

She has lit the cigarette and sees another way. She's afraid of eye contact. More afraid than yesterday and earlier today.

«I don't know. I guess I just wanted to have some fun», Victoria shrugs.

Fun. That's all it was. Fun.

I have been unfaithful to having a little «fun» with a girl I look up to as my sister. I'm an ugly person who can't set my own boundaries.

This has to get out of my head and out of the world. I will not lie to say that it wasn't nice there and then, but it can't continue like this.

«We both made a mistake. To ourselves and others invloved in our lives. I never mean to hurt you Victoria. I'm only put out when I don't know what's going on. If you're not ready to tell me, that's fine. Take your time, but you need to remember that I'm always here. I'm your best friend and always will be no matter what. Nothing changes even though things happened yesterday that should not have happened. We put it behind us and move on in life, right?», I smile and kiss her forehead.

A small smile grows on her lips as well. She places her arms around my neck and hugs me closely so I can hear her heart beating fast.

The sound of happiness. Real happiness.