Unexpected love / Damiano x Victoria

/ 3 /

It's been a few days since the conversation between me and Damiano, and I have a feeling that he ignores me for the gods know what. We talked about what happened at the party and everything worked out, so I have no idea about what's going on with him.

Damiano and Ethan are sitting on the diving board, so I take the opportunity to ask Thomas if he has heard anything.

«You're a little sunburned here», I smacked an area on his back. He shouted so the whole neighborhood could hear him.

«What do you want Vic?»

«Has Damiano been talking about me lately?», I bite my nail nervously. It's a habit I have every time I have anxiety or am a nervous wreck.

«No. Why?», Thomas answers briefly and squints at me. He understands when something is wrong.

«Something happened at the party and I kind of don't know if he believes in me», I have not talked to Thomas and Ethan about this, so they knew nothing until now.

I'm afraid they'll blame me. It was totally my fault, but I didn't think clearly. Anything that is not mine tempted that night. I hadn't had sex and was almost desperate. 

«What did you do?», Thomas' face changes from relaxed to despair very quickly.

My face turn completely red. I don't want to tell what I did. It's way too embarrassing. When I look at Thomas' facial expression again, I realize that I have no other choice.

«I pulled my thumb along his lower lip. Of course he stopped me and asked me to go to bed. The next day we talked about it and everything seemed fine to me. He said he was happy not to hurt me»

It got quiet. Looks like Thomas's trying to place what I just told him, and after a few small seconds, he looks up at me with wide eyes.

«Are you in love with him?», his voice is louder than ever.

I turn my head gently and watch Damiano and Ethan stare at us. Now he probably thinks I am talking about him. Good job Thomas. Damiano has a frown and doesn't seem to quite follow what Ethan is talking about.

«No! I'm not in love with Damiano. What we talked about is that we are just friends and that I would never push me on him», I explain desperately.

We swim and have fun until the evening when Damiano wanted ice cream and we all decide to join him. It's just down the street from a small shed where a cute old lady works. I've known her since I was a little girl.

The streets are full of light. I love Italy at this time of day. It gives me a feeling of happiness. Children run around me with balloons in their hands from the local amusement park that comes here every summer. I remember nonna always used to take me there before she died 5 years ago. I miss her.

Tears roll down my cheek. I try to hide it as best as I can, but my sobs become even louder as the memories flow.

«Are you okay love?», Damiano stands in front of me and before I even have time to blink, he has his arms around me.

«Yes. I just came to think of all the times nonna brought me to that amusement park»

«We miss her too Vic. Nonna was a lovely lady», he whispers into my ear.

When I have released all my emotions, we continue down to the small kiosk. I'm glad Damiano suggested ice cream, because now I also feel like buy some. When I'm sad, I like to eat a lot.

I order one with strawberry flavor, Damiano with coffee flavor. Thomas and Ethan order with vanilla because they're boring.

We'll pay until I find out I forgot my wallet back at home. I always manage to forget it when I actually need money. I sigh and try to find a quick sulotion.

«I'll take it», Damiano pushes himself in front of me and sends a small smile.

This is not the first time he pays me something because I'm good at forgetting my wallet. I feel just as bad every time. He doesn't allow me to pay back either.

We get our ice cream and sit in a park just a few meters away. The nightlife has calmed down sharply in just half an hour, which is quite nice. I listen to the birds who sings. I completely zone out. It's so beautiful.

Not long after, everyone is done with their ice cream. I will not return to the house yet. It's so rare for me to sit in peace and just listen to the sounds around me. As a rule, I am trapped around loud talking and screaming from the boys.

«We're going back now. Are you joining?», Ethan ask.

I shake my head. «No, I'm staying here»

«I will not let you sit here all by yourself in the middle of the night. I'll stay here with you»

Damiano sits down right in front of me. Does he not understand that I want to be alone? I wouldn't have stayed if I wanted company. That's pretty logical to me.

At least it seems like he understands that I want silence. Every night I go to bed with a headache, but not tonight. Please let it be like that. I don't have the capacity for more sleepless nights.

I avoid Damiano's gaze. It seems that he has so many questions and I can't handle that now. Is there a reason i'm sitting here? Yes. Is that reason the right one? I don't know.

After the party, I have thought a bit, or a lot, to be exact. Did I displace something? Why did I do as I did? I could have risked our whole friendship. I'm so fucking stupid.

«Out of all things, why did you really suspect that I was in love with you?», I ask. I quickly discover that it came out in a slightly rude way.

«What else would it be? Yes, I knew you were drunk, but I still never thought you would act on something. We've been friends for so long, and you never behaved like you did that night. Therefore, I got a suspicion», Damiano is quite upset now.

My behavior has affected him. Now I regret more than ever. Did I really think he was going to give in and not only risk our friendship, but also his relationship with Giorgia which has lasted for 4 years?

Yes, at one point that night I thought so. But I was so damn wrong. I've become conceited and selfish. I hate myself and what this boy is doing to me.

He's made me fall. Fall hard for him. My best friend and security.