365 Days with You

The Mind Reader.

Alrighty. Here's another chapter :) thank you everyone for all the support and love. Keep up the comments and votin' and I'll keep up the postin' ;) Anyways, enjoy! Xx

I sat up in bed. My lips were dry and cracked. My eyes had crunchy sleep in the corners. I sniffled and cracked my neck. I looked down at my leg. On my thigh was a thin pink scar, about four inches across.

They must have used a healing stone. But that stone still couldn't heal the shattered mess inside of me.

The bed next to me was empty. They probably used a healing stone on Loki too.

I was pulled from my thoughts by a soft 'hem hem'

"Hello, Lady Aislin, I'm Fay. I am supposed to escort you to your room." I nodded and didn't lift my eyes from my toes. Fay helped me from the bed and we hobbled down the halls. Her arm wrapped around my waist to keep me upright.

"Fay, where are we going?" I croaked as we passed mine and Loki's bedchambers.

"Well, Loki requested that you have your own room now." I nodded slowly, processing the information. It didn't even sting any more. Everything just felt numb. My tongue darted out in between my cracked lips to wet them.

The new bedchambers was the next room over. She helped me inside and then stood awkwardly in the sitting area.

"May I sit down, Lady Aislin?"

"Aislin. Not lady Aislin." I snapped.

"Oh my apologies..." She trailed off and then took a seat when I motioned for her to sit down. I felt like I was sinking into an endless hole. Like something was dragging me under. I could barely keep breathing. I couldn't keep my head above water much longer.

"I'm sorry." She blurted out suddenly. I turned and watched her. A blank expression on my face. That's the only expression I could hold anymore. Blank. Numb. Erased. Gone. Empty. Hollow. Oblivion. "About the baby, I heard this morning. It's very tragic." I nodded and watched her fiddle with her fingers nervously. "If....if you ever need someone...to, you know, um? Talk to? I'm always here...." She trailed off and then lept from the chair. "I should be going. Just ring that bell if you need anything." She pointed to a silver bell hanging on the wall. I nodded and waited for her to leave before crumpling to the floor. I pulled my knees to my chest and curled into a ball.

My chest felt hollow. I felt empty inside, purposeless. Loki left me. The baby is gone. I have nothing left to live for anymore. It's a miracle that they didn't boot my ass back to Midgard. Maybe uncle Tony would take me back in. I doubt it. I betrayed him. Why is my life so screwed up? My heart beat slowly in my chest. Reminding me that I was still alive. I sucked in air through my nose. My beating heart making me remember that I'm supposed to breathe. But breathing is hard right now. Living is hard right now. Everything is hard. It feels like lead weights are tied to every muscle and they drag me down when I try to move. My whole body aches from the weight. And the ocean is rising. Threatening to suck me under. The undertow far too strong for my frail body. And I could no longer cling to Loki to stay afloat. Depression always found a way to weasel its way back into my head. From the moment I started school. When my parents died. When Loki kidnapped me. The only time I thought I was finally free of the lead weights was when I with Loki, but now he's gone. And the lead weights have attached themselves to my body once more. Bringing me to my knees. I'm drowning but no one can see me struggle. No one knows that the lead weights act as anchors. Pulling me to the bottom of the endless black ocean. I say I'm fine but I fear that I'm going insane. I fear that my brain is slowly rotting away. Maybe if I lie here for a while longer it will. And I won't have to live with this dull ache in my ribcage. Where my heart should be. Where my heart should be thumping and stuttering when Loki fingers brush my cheek. Or when it flutters as he presses his lips to mine softly. Or when it skips as he walks down the halls towards me.