The Insurgence: Bleeding Silver

Take The Comfort Out Of Comforter

         I couldn't sleep. Every time I shut my eyes I'm taken back to what happened at the school, the gas station, my parents, my room. This place wasn't my room... This wasn't my place at all. I'm comfortable, I'm content, and I'm now considering if that could be fake. I'm surrounding by strange people in a new place, people who could alter me however they wished. I didn't freak out. I didn't ask enough questions... How could I be so stupid?

The air didn't smell or feel the same as my house. I could hear new buzzing in the lights that was driving me crazy. And I had to use the bathroom.

Was it possible I'm freaking myself out? Not used to the attention, the kindness, that I'm looking for a reason to give the reaction I know everyone was expecting from me? Everyone has been so generous and patient with me since I got here— not regular people but supernatural beings that I've probably seen on some TV show. I like it here, and I'm mesmerized with this new world I find myself in but now I'm realizing that I'm painfully aware that I'm not home. And now? I'm questioning the love I've received from my parents. I was content with mother's punishments because I know she has to love me and was teaching me a lesson. But now I realized that I didn't like being alone, I just never wanted my parents to come home. Now I wonder what that makes me as they sit frozen at the kitchen table at home.

I don't know if they loved me. But this was their plan to keep me safe? It has to mean something. Why didn't they care about all those times I begged to see a doctor but got me here? They had to have loved me, right? What kind of parent doesn't love their kid?

Did other kids get punished like I did?

I sat up and rubbed my face in my hands. I remembered that I wasn't alone in this room but there were no signs of life here I nearly forgot about Jack.

The air here is different— it's suffocating.

But I am safe now. I can take a step outside and maybe get a glimpse of the trees. Who knows or cares how far away I am from home, from school, I'm here to be protected. I don't have to stay cooped up or even be afraid to open a window... I could physically step outside for a minute. Just one minute for one calming breath of fresh air.

With a pit in my stomach I hoisted my legs out of Jack's bed and slowly rise to my feet, unsure of where the floor might groan from my footsteps. I felt the key Jack gave me in my pocket and took a deep breath.

Everything is fine. Just need a bathroom and a moment alone outside. It's been an overwhelming couple days. They understand that, they understand reality has caught up to me.

Why can't I shake the feeling that something is wrong?

I slowly opened the door and snuck through the crack, shutting it behind me. I exhaled a deep breath as I took a step away from the door. Wrong.

The hallways were completely dark, a maze I had yet to understand. I looked back and forth trying to remember where Jack had led me hours before but I couldn't see anything. My stomach churned and I glanced back at the door, something aching telling me this wasn't a good idea. I could probably ask Jack to come with me but I didn't want to disturb him.

Part of me felt guilty for leaving, as if I was going to find myself in trouble. With every step further down the hall the sinking panicked feeling grew. I was a guest, right? They wanted me to feel comfortable. Everyone here was meant to help protect me. I'm just freaking myself out. I can go outside whenever I want. It's just air.

I took a brave step forward, jolting at the sound of my own feet against the cold tile floor. I thought about Jack and how nervous he was around me, how hard he was trying just for me. He was the cause of all those headaches, simply trying to reach me when no one else even tried. Very inconvenient at times. But I wasn't going crazy, which was a relief. He really put both of us through pain because he was trying to reassure me.