Every Missing Piece

Chapter Four

"You'll remember from the memo you received this morning that the nature of this assignment is rather unusual."

Walter surveys the blockers sitting before him with a smile, though his benevolence appears more strained than usual this morning. There are four of us blockers today, all summoned to the blocker's department with an addendum at the bottom of our assignment that instructs us to report for further training. I still have no clue as to what, exactly, makes today's assignment unique. As Walter speaks, I remove the memo from my pocket and carefully smooth out the wrinkles as if that's all I need to find some answers.

As it is, there is too much else to occupy my mind. The past two days are a collection of missing pieces, and since this morning, I've been trying to sift through them until they fit together in a picture I can understand. Without the cure, my memory has doubled in length and brief instances from two days ago threaten to distract me. The warehouse of blocker records, the medic center, throwing away the pill, Alexa and her blood. They come to me in delicate fragments from a distant past where nothing is linear and everything has soft edges. The memories infiltrate my mind when I'm walking to work, when I'm trying to listen to Walter, when I'm contemplating how this pill will be the end of me and the virus will take me yet.

But it hasn't been the end of me, has it? Two days later and my heart still beats, my breath still comes steady. There's no virus and there's no death. I am lucky, and it will never last.

"You've all been trained to remove triggers for the deceased," Walter continues. "In this case, a representative from the Assembly has requested something a little...untraditional."

I sit up straight at the mention of the Assembly.

"For this assignment, the circumstances are very different from what you're used to encountering. Your subject today...well, he's still alive."

The other blockers whisper amongst themselves at Walter's announcement, but I can't quite seem to grasp the reality of the situation, no matter how many somersaults my mind turns. "It will be a valuable training experience," Walter says and the whispers hush. "Valuable, but undoubtedly challenging. The subject in this case is missing and, according to the Assembly, very dangerous. They've provided us with a list of locations that we should examine for triggers, but we'll need to be wary."

The girl next to me clears her throat and I, along with every other blocker in the room, turn to stare at her. Her dark eyes shine with intelligence even when she surveys Walter with uncertainty. "If this subject is so dangerous," she asks, "why does the Assembly want him erased? Won't that only create more problems if no one's aware of the threats?"

Walter nods. "Apt observation, and one I don't have a good answer for. I'd only like to remind everyone that we are not at liberty to choose who is erased and who is not. That is ultimately a decision for the Assembly and their consultants."

No one questions him further, but I want to; I want to ask why we so blindly follow the Assembly's laws, whether some of them are really necessary, and if I maybe deserve to die for my disobedience. I stay quiet, because I think I already know their answers.

Walter distributes the folders then and the other blockers tear into them eagerly, flipping through the files to learn of the case the Assembly has pieced together for us. I decide to leave instead. I can learn about the subject and my assigned location just as easily outside, away from my fellow blockers' enthusiasm. Erasing a person never seemed like something I should be excited for.

But maybe it can be different this time, can't it? The subject is alive; maybe he won't be truly erased after all, no matter how many triggers we remove. There's no way of knowing for certain.