unsolicited advice

twelve

the tall boy took a deep breath in, an obvious sign that he was submerged in thaught.

"what's up?" i mumbled. the slight change of atmosphere making me slightly uncomfortable. he looked up from the crystal water wich he was still wading his feet through, staring up at me with a sorrow filled look.

"nothing...just, my moms been through a lot-still is going through a lot," he corrected, looking down at his hands and twiddling his bejewelled thumbs, "my dads a peice of work" a light scoff slash sigh escaped him, "mom loves him, he doesn't love her kinda situation. a lot of my childhood was arguing and shouting and 'go you your room!' and then they'd fight some more." i can tell his heart was breaking and that he had all this building up with no one to talk to about it. "sometimes i catch myself thinking what it would be like if he ran off or- got imprissoned or something, that would probably make my life easier."

there was a silence, it was a weird kind of scilence where i don't know if i should say anything, let otto say something or just straight up leave.

i cleared my throat and made shifted around on the concrete pool ledge, "i always say that i've never met my dad or- i don't have one, but, truth is i just wish that was true." i chucked slightly in purely because i couldn't beleive i was confessing this,"he was some rich guy from australia... he used to love my mother but-" i stopped a little and took a deep breath in, "love should be a wildfire and what they felt for each other was only a spark, it never grew anything more and slowly but surly burned out." i lifted my head up to meet his gaze," so when he ran off, mom was absoloutly heartbroken and put me up for adoption."

"you sound like you've had a tough love life miss bea" he chucked lightly and nudged my side slightly, sending electricity crackiling through my veins, the slight touch of a person was much needed at this difficult memory, making it better it was otto.

"i wish" i murmured lightly hoping that he would not hear my self depricating remark yet i'm sure he did but just didn't say anything and looked down at his lap, lips slightly curled at the sides.

i found myself just looking at him. his whole person was mezmorising. the more i talk to this tall, curly haired boy i felt as if i was being drawn in more- it was intoxicating.

we talked on and on about our family's and my lack-there-of, it's weird talking to someone who has such a similar life story but yet also so extravagantly different.

"why'd you still call her mom?" he spoke up after a light comfortable scilence, slightly catching my off guard.

"hm?" looking into his electrifyingly dark eyes.

"you call your birth mother- the one who abandoned you on a front step of an orphanage- mom still, why'd you do that?" there was a genuine curiosity tone in his voice as he spoke, because of this i fel obligated to answer truthfully.

tilting my head slightly to the left, making eye contact once again, "i have no fucking idea"

///

hello my lovelies! did you miss me 😘
jk, sorry i haven't been writing my stinkys but finals  are over so i should be writing more now.
i'm being bribed into going to school with promise of a new baker board at the end of the week, know your worth babes 😘
~beth