Hometown

Chapter 11 - Entrustment

"I won't ask again." His head was pressed against the bricks of the chimney. We both sweat violently under the heat, under the pressure. Much was at stake. 

If he said the wrong thing and if I had the guts, my blade would slice his throat. I only wondered what he could possibly say to make this right. He hesitated, darting his eyes back and forth between the steel at his neck and me.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you..." He looked at me, perhaps hoping I'd give him a way out. I didn't budge. "I guess I have no choice..." He closed his eyes solemnly, then opened them once again gazing into mine. His silent stare was unbearable. "[Y/N]. I'd never want to hurt you. After all these years, you should know that. Please, put it down..." He spoke of the blade.

His sweet, yet sad expression almost melted me, and my rage began to subside. Just looking at him had made me realize how horrible things had gotten. He was my best friend just the night before, yet somehow, I had a blade at his throat? I slowly moved back from him and drooped my arms to my side. My body was numb. As Reiner approached me, I gestured for him to stop his advance.

"No. Stay there... Don't– don't come any closer." I looked away, fearing that if I met his eyes, I might forgive him for whatever he had done.

"Your voice is shaking." Reiner said tenderly. "Let me hold you. Please, I can't bear to look at you like this, standing there alone." In silence, I moved closer to him. I still couldn't bring myself to look at him, yet even so his arms wrapped around me and I lay my head on his chest. We stood there silently for a moment.

"Reiner... What did you do?" I asked him flatly. 

He let go of me, and placed both his hands on my shoulders as he bent down ever so slightly so our eyes were level.

"[Y/N]. I'm the Armored Titan." He stared at me, determined and stern. At first, I almost didn't let myself believe him, but his face... It was the same look Reiner had everyday, but this time it was different. I expected him to say more, but he seemed to be mute. He was waiting for me.

"How do I respond?" I exclaimed, saying my thoughts aloud. He stared at me and said nothing. My pulse quickened. "It's not just you, is it? Annie and Bertholdt were with you that day in the mess hall, speaking discreetly... This isn't a one person thing, is it?"

"It's not just me, you're right," he admitted. "Bertholdt's the Colossal." 

I clutched the waistcloth of my uniform. Neither anger nor sadness sparked from his words. Instead, I was petrified. Fear sank in. I was scared... I was scared of him. 

"Please, calm down. You're shaking." He tried to pull me closer as he spoke, but I didn't let him.

"Wha– what do I do with this?" I turned back to look at him. "Who are you? Wha– what are you?" Questions raced through my mind. I wanted to ask them all, but I needed to get away from him. I needed a moment to myself. Emotions were flooding through me, all of them sparked from fear.

"I'm me, [Y/N]." He tried to calm me down. "I'm Reiner, and I always will be. I'm human, and I always will be." His eyes were latched onto mine. "I am still the same person you've always known, and I don't wanna hurt you." I bit my lip, trying and failing to hold back tears.

"[Y/N], I know it's a lot to take in, and there's more to it. One day I'll explain more, but you have to trust me." He was pleading. "Believe me, I know it's a lot to ask." He got on his knees and held my hand in his. His words stabbed me, but his eyes looked into mine, and his hands held mine. His touch and his stare was gentle and soothing... No.

"Trust you?" I pulled my hand away. "If what you're saying is true, then that day you were in Shiganshina. It seems it was your fault my family died... I'm supposed to trust you?" I wiped the tears from my cheek. I couldn't stop sobbing. Reiner reached for me, but I wouldn't let him touch me.

"[Y/N], please... I'm doing the right thing, and I need you." His voice was breaking ever so slightly, but no tears fell from his eyes. "I'm so sorry for all the pain I've caused you– But please, trust me. I know it's a lot to ask, but I need you to keep it a secret from the others." He stared at me desperately. "You will... won't you?" There was a hint of doubt, as well as a trace of hope in his voice.

"I– I need to think..." I finally managed to say. Reiner's arm dropped to his side as he looked at me concerned. I felt myself still shaking while attempting to make sense of it all. I needed to leave... 

"Oi!" An urgent voice called out. Jean landed on the roof we stood on. "They've given the order to retreat, the evacuation was successful." Jean paused for a moment when he noticed me sniffling and Reiner standing there looking defeated. "Hey..." Jean said, inching closer to me as he placed his hand on my shoulder. "What happened? What's going on?" I looked to Reiner. He appeared to be petrified, most likely thinking I may reveal what I'd learned.

"Jean... let's go." I grabbed Jean's wrist and looked to him. He seemed to understand as he grabbed my waist and zipped us away from the scene. I didn't mind, I felt too broken to even try using the ODM gear myself.

As I looked back, Reiner turned and shot his wires urgently in the direction of HQ, where Bertholdt and Annie had gone. Which made me think, if Bertholdt is the Colossal, does that mean Annie is a Titan too? I hadn't heard about another intelligent Titan, so I wondered; what did Annie have to do with those two?

Jean and I landed in an alley closer to where I had been with Armin. This whole time I noticed there had been less Titans in the area... Where had they gone?

Suddenly Jean moved closer to me. It was astonishing to see that instead of his usual sly expression, he seemed serious and possibly worried and concerned.

"[Y/N], what happened?" He leaned against the wall as he spoke. "Did Reiner do something, or was it something else?" I wiped my eyes a final time, trying to compose myself.

"It's... we just had a fight. That's all." Jean turned to me, squinting his eyes trying to see through my lie.

"Oi, I don't believe you," He said coldly. "That didn't look like a fight. That was just you crying, or at least that's what I saw." He pushed himself off the wall as he made his way closer to me. He suddenly placed his hand on the stone over my right shoulder behind me, almost cornering me. He moved his face close to mine and eyed me. "What made you cry? He said something, didn't he?"

"Just stay out of it! It doesn't involve you–" He smiled and only inched forward closer.

"You're wrong. I've always been involved." He spoke in a husky voice. Suddenly, I felt Jean pressing me against the stone wall, as he got closer and closer, his eyes fastened on me.

"Wha– what are you– Hey! Wait–!" All at once, his lips were attached to mine. I tried to speak, but only a muffled whimper escaped. With his one hand still on the wall, he took his other and held my chin up gently, tilting my head. I could smell his masculine scent as he kissed me. His touch and his body pressed on my own, causing me to forget how much I hated him for a second. Slowly, he removed his lips from mine. His brown eyes were intense and sharp as they pierced through me. His hold remained on my chin as he stared down into my eyes.

"You see?" He spoke in a hushed low tone. He looked to my lips, then back to my eyes and grinned. "I'm involved now."