Saturday Squad

Chapter 10: Spotlight

Noah

  Isang Linggo na ang nakalipas nang makalaya kami ng buong squad sa kulungan. Sa totoo lang, halos dalawang oras lang naman kaming nakulong. Hindi na kami pinatagal sa kulungan dahil wala naman kaming ginawang masama.

  Nakalaya ang buong squad except for Jeff. Hanggang ngayon nasa kulungan pa rin siya. I mean, it makes sense that he's still in prison, he basically is the one who actually killed Serenity.

  Pero kahit na wala kaming lahat sa kulungan ngayon. May private detective naman na palaging bumibisita sa mga bahay namin. As far as I know, yung mama ni Serenity yung nag hire dun sa detective. Naaalala ko yung una akong binisita ng private detective, pinakwento niya sa'kin kung ano yung nangyari nung araw na namatay si Serenity. Kinuwento ko naman lahat ng nalalaman ko. But it was really hard for me to tell the detective the things that I know. Because I know I'm putting Jeff in danger, and I don't want him to be on jail forever. I know it sounds crazy, but even though I already broke up with him, my feelings for him never went away.

  Every time I open my socials, I always see posts of people hating on Jeff. Kalat na kalat yung balita na pinatay niya si Serenity. Lalo na't binalita na rin ito sa mga local and international news channels. People are harshly hating on him, they all can't believe that he would do such thing as violent as that. Pero nung mga nakaraang linggo pa naman siya nababash.

  Yung araw na cinancel niya si Serenity, kahit na maraming tao ang nag hate kay Serenity. Marami ding tao ang nag hate kay Jeff. Some people didn't like the way he weaponized the LGBT community on cancelling Serenity. They find it very toxic, and they also said that he could've handled the situation in a different way. 

  But the thing is... Jeff didn't seem to even see that. If there's one thing that I learned about Jeff, it's that he only see the good things around him, even though everything around him is falling apart.

  Pati kaming Saturday Squad, binabash na rin sa internet. Our friend group is shining the same way that Jeff's name is shining.  

  I'm getting really sad, and I want to get my feelings out, so I messaged Dylan. I asked him if he can come and talk to me. Agad namang pumunta si Dylan sa bahay ko. 

  Me and Dylan are now sitting on my bedroom floor. 

"What do you want to talk about? I'm here to listen." Dylan asked.

"I don't know, it's just things are hard for me right now." I said.

Dylan pat me in the back, "I know, it's been hard for all of us, don't worry it will get better."

  There was a moment of silence.

"I think I still love Jeff." I suddenly said.

"What!?" Dylan confusedly said.

"I know it sounds crazy, but I still have feelings for him."

"Oh come on, you can't be serious. Hey Noah look at me..." Dylan snaps his finger in front of my face, "...he's a murderer. Jeff's not a good person."

"Yeah I know, but what if I can change him?"

"Ano ka? Pick me gurl?? You can't change a person who's inherently bad."

"He's not a bad person! He's just- he's just..."

"He's just what?"

"He's just—Well... I don't know! But I'm sure he's not a bad person."

  Dylan made me faced him.

He started speaking to me; "Noah, look at me. I know your break up with Jeff is like your first serious break up ever. But that doesn't mean it's the end of the world. It's not your responsibility to fix him, okay."