Lonely for you only

Chapter 14

I understood what she meant, but I am still so upset at what he did and how he handled the situation; he's been reaching out throughout the week. He explained exactly what happened, how he assumed that my brother was a man I was seeing, what he saw in the hall and the reason he went to the bar, and what he did to the woman I caught with him.

He came clean, and he kept apologizing, but I kept ignoring him; how could I really trust that he wanted a stable relationship? What was the purpose of chasing me as he did for only to react that way? Even if he assumed that was a man I was dating, it was his first instinct to go find another woman and publicly make out and grope each other?? and not try to ask me or clear it out? Are guys really wired that way? I don't buy it, I thought to myself.

"Look, Allie bear," her voice comes out clean through my cellphone speaker. "All we want is your happiness, Dave, and I want to see you happy, and you are stopping yourself from getting it and being it," she says sternly.

"Anyway, I understand your hesitation, but I think you should talk to him about It. Tell him how you feel and let him say his peace too and figure it out between you both; you are self-destructing before anything ever happened, plus it's not like you guys want to get married, and it could even just end up as a fling but if you are happy at the moment with him, being by him don't you think you at least deserve that no matter how short-lived it might be?" I chuckle at how deep this conversation was going.

"whoa, Dr. Phil, that's deep," I say in a chuckle, "did those pregnancy hormones give you super Yoda relationship powers ahh" now saying it sarcastically.

Laughter erupts on the other side of the line, "Listen, just be happy, do something that makes you feel alive and live a little just think about it, please, Allie bear, I gotta go, but I will text you later and tell the boys good luck for tomorrow.

The line hangs up, and I lay in bed after the conversation; the Truth was that I missed him; every time I saw him, my body always just tried to gravitate towards him, and it was torture to try to hold back from doing so. Each time at games seeing him angry and frustrated, looking defeated made my heart hurt, and I couldn't do anything about it.

He wasn't himself. He was sad, desperate, and angry all the time, completely opposite from the happy, fun-loving silly, and goofy man child that I got to know at our PT sessions; he was in a way unrecognizable, and was it really because of me? I thought to myself.

I glance over to the clock on my nightstand, realizing I been lying here for over an hour, so I got up to make a decision.

"Fuck it," I said, and I got dressed; I put on a pair of jeans and a crop top. Jen is right. We need to talk this out like adults. We need to clear the air, and we need to move on whatever the outcome. I walk out of my room, and I head over to James's room cause it's the only room I know, so I knocked, and he answers the door, half asleep.

"Hey, James, sorry to bother you, I left my room a bit hurried, and I don't have my phone, can you tell me Danny's room number? I see him grin. "It's 502 over there down the hall," I thank him, and he closes his door.

Once I got to Danny's door, I stare at the number plate, and I contemplate on what I'm doing along with questioning my sanity, but for that second, but like second nature, I reached out and started to knock. Seriously feeling like he is just like a magnet to me; a few seconds later, I hear his ruff and gruff voice on the other side, and my heart started to pound into my chest.

I see the door open, and I scan his body, realizing he's only in boxer briefs with a Bluetooth speaker in his hand. "Dude, you said you were just gonna get this from me tomorrow," rubbing his eyes, still looking at the floor sleepily and I feel my breathing hitch.