Even The Playing Field | BOOK #1 IN THE PSU SERIES

thirty-seven

I feel him shudder, I look up and see him watching me with intense eyes. It was nice to know that I had this effect on him.

"I'm pudgy." I speak as he busts out laughing, breaking his trance. He reaches for the bottom of my shirt, he grips it between his fingers and raises it. "You are the farthest thing from pudgy but even if you were, it wouldn't matter." He speaks the last three words while lowering the shirt and looking into my eyes. "Just means there's more of you to like and more of you to hold on to while I pummel you—" I cut off his vulgar words with a laugh.

I blush and look away.

"I made you blush," He teases as I let out a laugh and look away. His left hand reaches up and pulls at my chin so I'm looking down at him—into his eyes. "It's cute." He says while smiling at me. I nod at him while he just observes me.

"I feel like you want me, but you can't have me? And that is completely fine if you feel like that. But I'm yours to have whenever you're ready." He speaks as he twirls a piece of my hair in between his fingers. I inhale a big breath. Should I tell him? Word vomit?

It was eating me alive. He was opening up to me and I couldn't even tell him about me.

"Naomi. I don't know how to describe it? It's like one day I was so content just being a bachelor. I was so content with just being by myself. I didn't want anyone to share this with. But now I do want to share this with you." He speaks as his hands find my waist and we look into eachothers eyes.

"I want to share it all with you. But you won't let me. For all good reasons though and I completely understand. But I promise you, when you let me—it will be for all of the right reasons and I will cherish every second of every moment with you." I watch as he gets serious.

It was eating me alive.

"Matti I have something to—" I try to speak but I'm cut off again. "No. I'm not finished. I'm literally obsessed with you NJ. You've turned me into a domesticated man within a matter of two, almost three months. You have made me different for all of the right reasons. Because of you I care more. What I didn't have you brought out in me. Thank you for treating me like a real person. I was so used to everyone wanting me for one thing, and I just adore you." He proclaims.

I bend over his torso and kiss his cheek.

How do I respond to that? I'm sorry you've been opening up to me this entire time but I'm not really who I say I am? I'm only partially who I say I am?

I pat his chest and get off of the top of him. He groans as I stand on my two feet, next to the bed. I watch as his eyes follow my body. He lets out a low whistle, "Those leggings," He speaks as I laugh.

"Do you have ice cream?" I ask as he nods. He sits up and stands up off of the bed. He reaches for my hand—pulling me with him out the door and down the stairs. "Slow down," I laugh out as we're taking two steps at a time. He looks back at me and laughs.

We enter the kitchen and he grabs my hips and sets me on the counter, I squeal at the unexpected gesture.

He walks over to the freezer. "I picked these up the other night." He says while reaching into the fridge grabbing two containers of strawberry and mint chocolate chips. I smirked, "Oh, so you just knew I was gonna come eat ice cream?" I teased as he pulled out spoons. He gave me a smile, "No. But I was hoping you would." He spoke as he passed me my spoon and container.

He hopped onto the other end of the island and we stared at each other while eating our ice cream. I watched the spoon enter his warm mouth—melting the ice cream and pulling it out, clean.

I shivered and it wasn't because of the ice cream.

"You don't have to take me home next week." I say as I take a spoonful. He looks at me and laughs. "I'm going to see my new best friends." He denies as I roll my eyes.