Virgin Lips

6. Teen boys are dumb

"He's just lonely," I took a bite, "says he doesn't have much time to make friends, with work and everything."

"And you believe that?" Joe laughed loudly.

"Why wouldn't I?"

"Aren't you the one always telling me how guys always lie?"

I frowned. What reason would Ben have to lie?

As if he'd read my mind, Joe continued: "Clearly he's after something."

"Like what?"

He rolled his eyes, this time. "Uh ... I don't know, you, maybe?"

I scoffed. "As if."

"Why not?"

Oh, I love you, Joe, but let's not go there. "It's more likely that he's a spy working for the CIA."

Joe scoffed one more time, lying down on the couch to prepare for the movie. "You're really blind, sometimes, Joy."

"Says the guy aiming for the cheerleader when his best friend pines for him."

Joe furrowed his brow, which made him look like a cute puppy. Seriously, I often forget he's pretty much a baby. "What the hell are you talking about, woman?"

I rolled my eyes. Cleverer than most boys his age, but still clueless when it comes to the other gender. "Nothing." I stood up to go get glasses for the both of us. I may not understand a single thing about love and relationship, but it didn't take me much to see that cute little Phoebe, Joe's Chemistry partner, is head over heels for him. And I saw her like, once: she was at the pizzeria when I went to get my dinner on my way home. "So, Transformers?" I decided to change subject when I saw his quizzical look.

Joe remained like that for a few seconds, seemingly doing some mental relationship Math, then his features softened, clear sign he'd given up, and, having plopped back against the couch, he grinned, nodding. I threw the remote at him. "I still think Ben wants to be Mr. Joanna Brooks, though." The little rascal teased as I walked to the sink.

"And you say that based on your vast knowledge and experience in the field?" I teased, to which he threw me a pillow that hit my back, and we both laughed.

Ben into me. As if. The guy just needs friends and I'm his only option since he lacks time to go out and whatnot. Wanna bet the moment he starts making actual friends he'll forget his neighbor?

--

I rolled my eyes for the umpteenth time as I heard Joe snore. He decided to crash on my couch last night, I guess deciding we're at a point in our weird friendship that it was time for me to discover the worst things about him.

Number one: he talks in his dreams, which are mostly all about Chloe Jensen, the superhot cheerleader every boy at his school wants, finally giving him the time of day. Teenage boys are unequivocally dumb, and I hoped Joe would be smarter, but you know, hormones. I don't know Chloe, but if she's as smart as the stereotype, then I'm sorely disappointed in my teeny friend.

Number two: Joe snores. He's not loud ... he's Jurassic Park T-Rex preparing to attack kind of loud. First time I heard it I thought a Mr. Hammond had actually brought dinosaurs back to life. It's true that my apartment is the size of a shoebox, but this kid has some serious problems.

Sighing for the billionth time, I blindly grabbed the phone, to check the time. Four am. The only times I woke up at this hour are when Scott is extra-assholey and claims I can only do inventory before we open, not during, not after. I must have slept 3-4 hours. Deciding it would be useless to try again, I got up. Even my cats were still asleep.

I tiptoed my way around the house, executing my usual routine: prepare food for the cats, shower, get dressed. I even prepared breakfast for Joe, even though I never eat it. All this, and I was out by 5 am.

Since it was way too early for everything, and I had no intention of prolonging my stay in that wretched place that pays my bills, I decided I'd get on with other stuff I'm normally too tired or too lazy to do, like laundry. Last time I did it, I met my sexy neighbor with whom I haven't spoken since the night he spent amiably in my apartment chatting with my friends and their brother.

Lupus in fabula, Romans would say, meaning, speak of the devil ... the moment I stepped out of my apartment to go do laundry, Ben was about to enter his. He looked disheveled and exhausted – clearly, he'd spent the night out. Is he cheating on his girlfriend?

"Hey, neighbor!" He greeted me, too cheerful and lively for 5 am, even for him.

"Hi." I murmured, holding my laundry basket tight against my hip while simultaneously trying not to blush because I was wearing my uniform – I'm allowed to wear leggings underneath, but skirts, every kind of skirt always makes me nervous, they mercilessly expose my chunky legs.

"How come you're up so early?" Ben asked, unfortunately walking up to me. "Or you didn't sleep at all?" He tilted his head to the side, fainting a malicious smirk. "I heard you had a guest last night." My eyes widened. How would he ... "These walls are really thin," he chuckled, only to then wince a bit, "actually ..." he grazed the back of his neck, wearing an apologetic look on his face, "I should apologize ... you probably hear me on the phone a lot."

I wanted to say no, I don't, I'm not an eavesdropper, but it would be a lie. Sure, I can't really hear what he's saying, but I definitely hear his voice a lot. "It's ok." I mumbled, staring at my feet.

Ben raked a hand over his face, clearly sleepy. "I had a wedding yesterday. Italians. It went on until 4 am. Actually, I think they're still there, but the groom had mercy of me and sent me home."

Why did it sound like he was trying to justify to me? Because of that, I felt the need to justify as well. "My friend crashed on my couch, but he snores, so ..."

Ben chuckled again. Nice sound. "That must have been torture," he continued laughing, "my ex was like that, it was definitely a deal-breaker, hope it isn't for you, too."

My eyes widened for the second time and I blushed. "It's not like that!"

"Why not?"

Because he's underage and I'd go to jail? Or because the idea of me and Joe together makes me puke? Or just both? "We're friends."

"The same kind of friends I've been trying to be with you?"

I blinked my eyes, perplexed. What did that even mean?

Ben covered his mouth with a hand, "time to go to bed, clearly I'm not in control of what I say anymore." He backed away. "See you tonight, JoJo!" And then he vanished. Well, that was hella weird.