eloquence ➪ aot oneshots + prefs

walk // connie

I twisted around under the scratchy blanket we got when we'd been selected to join the Levi squad. I guessed it was past one in the morning, and I stood no chance of getting any sleep, but I guessed it was best to get as much rest as I could before training tomorrow. I stared out the window and looked out across the huge field that lay in front of the former Scout headquarters, thinking of my comrades who slept in the rooms adjacent. I considered getting up a a a for water, but that would only make me more awake, which was something I didn't really need right now. Groaning, I rolled over to I was facing the wall and squeezed my eyes shut, frustrated that I couldn't just sleep.

In the silence, my head began to fill with doubts. What if I could never live up to the expectations of Captain Levi? What if, because of my lack of skill, my comrades lives would be lost in place of mine? I honestly was not the best one here, even if I wasn't exactly the worst. I had excelled in the beginning, second only to Reiner and Mikasa, but had slowly fallen behind when I began to overthink. I was now probably just as good as the rest of them, at best, which was something I couldn't accept. The silence was interrupted by a quiet knock on my door.
Was I about to be yelled at?

I stood up, dusted myself off and started toward the door quietly. My feet made no noise as I walked, delicately striding across my room. When I opened the door, I saw that there was no one there and the hallway was empty.

"Oh," I whispered before shutting it and walking back to my bed. I jumped when someone opened the door themselves, having been sure that the hallway was already empty. The faint moonlight illuminated his face slightly, but not enough for me to tell who it was exactly.

"I'm so sorry I should've knocked," Connie's voice stammered as he backed out of the doorway.
"No, no," I said, hurrying towards him, "is something wrong? Should I get ready?" I was incredibly anxious from not getting any sleep.
"Nothing's wrong..." he looked at the ground as we stood in the hall. He looked tired, too, and I was about to ask why he'd stopped by when he looked up suddenly.

"Wanna go for a walk?" he asked, sighing with fatigue.

"What?" I asked, unsure if I'd heard him right.

"Never mind, it's nothing," he waved me off and started to say goodnight, but I assumed I'd heard him correctly and answered.

"Let me change quickly," I smiled, "wait there." I turned into my room and changed as quickly as I could, not wanting to lose the few precious hours of moonlight that remained.

When I returned, Connie looked even more tired than before. I'd spent a lot of time with him when we were cadets, especially other than in hand-to-hand combat training when I'd usually kick his ass. Well, not exactly towards the end of training, but my point still stands. I could still tell that he was tired beyond belief, too, but couldn't sleep either. "Ready?" he nodded and we strode side by side down the stairs and out the huge wooden doors. He held the door open for me, and I smiled weakly before stepping out into the night. He caught up to me and we froze, seeing the Captain sitting on a bench in front of the headquarters. I was convinced he'd get mad in an instant and we'd be sent back to our rooms like children, but he just let out a small 'tch' and turned back to the fields. It seemed we weren't the only ones who couldn't sleep.

Even though he hadn't gotten angry with us, Connie and I hurried out of his sight and only slowed down once we were in the open field that sat behind a wall of the old castle where he couldn't see us.
A light breeze tugged at my hair as we ambled through the field, not going anywhere in particular. I craned my neck to look up at the stars and constellations above us and was slightly disappointed to see that there weren't many visible through the clouds.

"Hm," I said, turning to Connie. I felt my face get hot when I realized that he didn't have to turn and he'd already been looking at me. I did my best to cover it up, but I'm not sure it worked, "It'll rain soon," I pointed out, looking at the ground to hide my red face.