Butterfly || Jin

18 - Let Go

Thankfully his parents was out from the country at that time so they didn't need to see him looking so messed up and smelled like a rotten egg.

His noona was quick on her feet. She grabbed a towel and wiped off the sticky-almost-dry raw egg on his head and face. She told him to take a warm shower in which he gladly did.

Once he finished cleaning himself and get out from his room, the dining table was full with foods and the noona was still cooking more foods. He took a seat there after everything was done.

Yulhee keep looking at him worriedly. She keep asking him if he was alright or not and of course Jin's answer was, he was not okay. He was still scared despite being at his home, the home where he grew up in.

Jin was reaching for his phone when Yulhee stopped him.

"They took my pictures. There must be videos too" Jin said, tears filled up in his eyes.

It was so humiliating to Jin. He didn't want people to see that videos or pictures of him getting ambushed.

"Don't worry, I already take care of it. You just eat and rest okay?" she replied calmly to him.

After the dinner he went back to his room. The least thing he wanted to do was to think about what happened today so he decided to sleep through the night.

The next morning came, he woke up with a bandage around his wrist. Yulhee saw his cut, indeed.

"I took a day off-" she said.

"You didn't have to" Jin cut.

"It is not like that, I need a break too. So now, let's celebrate your birthday. I was busy yesterday so I didn't have time to celebrate it with you" she said.

Well, so that was how he knew he was humiliated on his birthday. He didn't even know it was his birthday.

At noon, his brother was back from work and he did see the worried face from his brother. Not wanting to remind Jin back about what happened, they decided not to talk about what happened yesterday.

So why does today out of every day, he remembered the shitty moment? Especially tomorrow is going to be his fifth birthday without Bangtan.

If Taehyung would be there, he will surely messed up Jin's face calling him cute and such, if Jimin would be there, he must be the captain of the cake decoration and if Hoseok would be there, he surely will be the loudest person to sing the birthday song to him.

For Yoongi, he would clap at him while singing the birthday song in his silly impersonation voice and if Namjoon would be there he would join the whole crap. Jungkook would always be the one who's on mission to distract him from the members as to not ruin the surprise but Jin always know what they are doing.

It was a silly hope but he hopes for the members to be here with him.

When the nurse came in with the food for dinner, she was surprised to see him in his on room instead of wondering everywhere in the hospital. Even for Jin himself he didn't realised he did nothing for the whole day and it is already night.

He silently eats the food or more like playing with the food although he's not even hungry let alone to have the appetite to eat.

Surprisingly today is too empty for him and it is eating him from the inside. He didn't like that feeling, he never like that feeling.

Thinking about it again, this year. This year in fact he no longer wants to feel the emptiness on his birthday alone.

The emptiness is suffocating him that he could no longer wants to feel the same feeling anymore.

Everyone has turned their back on him. He no longer receive any wishes on his birthday except from his parents, brother and sister in law.

Truth to say, he always wait for the members to wish him on his birthday but they never did.

Maybe because they're also hurting because of the deed he did to them that caused them to resent him that much. It was not a surprise for him but he did hope to receive maybe a few words from the members.

Even a short message like "Happy Birthday" was enough for him but no, he didn't deserve it.

Some might say birthday wishes aren't important but some do say it is important and Jin is the latter.
Because for him, birthday wishes makes him know that he is still matter.

Apparently he is no longer matter for everyone.

"Seokjin hyung!"

A kid is shouting at him, Seungyeon specifically is shouting at him while running and jumping around with so much joy towards him.

Knowing that he didn't want the kid to see his tears, he quickly wipes the tears away leaving no trace except for the red nose.

It would not be weird since it is winter and he is at the hospital which is operated by the air conditioner.

"I make this for you!" Seungyeon shouts in joy.

He takes out a folded piece of paper from his shirt. Slowly he unfold the paper showing Jin his new drawing. The drawing that struck his heart as he saw that.

Jin smiles fondly at the kid as Seungyeon is showing his drawing excitedly to him.

"It's so beautiful. Can I keep it to myself?" Jin asks as he brushes the kid's hair.

"Of course, I make this for you. You can put in the frame and display it in your house once you're discharge from this place" Seungyeon smiles as he replies to him, still pointing out the drawing with his index finger while explaining the behind story of his drawing.

Looking back at Jin, Seungyeon frowns.

"Why are your eyes and nose red? Do you have a fever?" the kid asks.

"Ah, no I don't have the fever, it just tonight is so cold. You shouldn't walk around without your sweater" Jin says as he takes off his sweater and help the kid to wear it.

It's kind of cute looking at the small kid wearing an adult size. Jin chuckles as he looks at the kid wearing his sweater.

After a moment looking fondly at the kid and the drawing, the situation turns silent. Seungyeon could feel the atmosphere change too.

It was then Jin stands up from his kneeling position, greeting the boy goodbye as it is already late at night and walk away from the hallway.

Yes Seungyeon is still a small kid but he surely could notice that there's something wrong especially when his Seokjin hyung isn't even on his path to his own room.

Seungyeon stands there looking at Jin's back as he walks away.