Under My Skin (on hold)

Chapter 16- Surrender

Jeremiah woke up in the hospital room, definitely not in Kansas anymore. It wasn't too far into the afternoon and the rest of the band was just coming back from lunch. As he was regaining his bearings, he realized e was looking into the eyes of the girl they brought here last night.

"Good morning, sleeping beauty. The earth says hello." she smiled at him.

"Good morning to you too." He responded, rubbing the bump on his head.

"You brought me here last night, didn't you?"

"Yeah. Me and my band were coming back from a show and you were in the road, all bloody and gross, so we took you here."

"Why a hospital this far away?"

"This is the town where I live, and our last show was here."

"You look like hell, man."

"I feel like it, too. How are you?"

"I'll survive." she paused. "My name is Corinne."

"Jeremiah. It's nice to meet you."

"Well, Jeremiah, while you were still asleep, I heard your band talking."

"Oh man." He laughed under his breath.

"And it sounds like you have a gig to play tonight. But your fiancée doesn't want you to?"

"Yeah. It's the last show of the tour, and all I have to do is play drums for an hour or so. The doctors didn't recommend it, but I think I'll be fine."

"Don't do it. Listen to your fiancé, as she notices everything."

"What do you mean?"

"Women pick up on the things you don't. Like, when you're not focused or into the conversation, we notice. The little things. All I'm saying is that she can see you're not fine and doesn't want to see you hurt. You should listen to her, and she will listen to you back. Go talk to her."

"But I don't want to leave you. I want to make sure you're fine before I get up and run."

"My mother is in the cafeteria. She flew in early this morning."

"Yeah, Jeremiah. She's here." Ben clarified without looking up, as he was playing on his old Nintendo DS over in the corner. "We need to go to the club for a sound check, and Beth will be there. We can do an acoustic set, it's fine."

"Thanks, since I really have to talk to her. I need to work things out."

"You sure you feel good enough to up and walk out of here?"

"If not, we can always come back."

Jeremiah felt like the car ride took forever to see Bethany. His stomach was filled with the same butterflies he felt when he first met her, and he was anxious. Benjamin had never seen him like this before and was nearly positive it was the concussion. If it wasn't that, Ben thought it was that Jeremiah had a major realization and needed to get it off his chest as soon as possible. Or both.

"Do you want to go grab some lunch first, man? I'm starving and I ate breakfast."

"I'm not really hungry." The drummer responded.

"The last time you ate was last night before the show, Jeremiah."

"Yeah and I'm not really hungry."

"Listen. Bethany will still be there, you need to take care of yourself."

"Or I could think about her first and have lunch later."

"How about I go drop you off, get us lunch while you talk to her and bring it to you and you can eat it whenever?"

"I can work with that."

"Good. And relax, man. You look like you're about to spontaneously combust."

"I feel like it, too."

The rest of the car ride was silent, but Jeremiah's anxiety was obviously evident. Ben understood how he felt, as he had felt like he was just going to explode on any regular day. He knew that there was nothing that he could ever say to Jeremiah in order to calm him down but before he left the car and took off in a full on sprint towards the club, Ben offered him

"Hey, man, it's gonna be okay."

Not expecting those words to come from Ben's mouth, Jeremiah stopped to think for a second and say thank you before he slammed the car door and continued on his determined mission to talk to Bethany. In the club, he stopped running when he found her. She wasn't as happy to see him as he was for her.

"Jeremiah, this isn't the time or place."

"No, Beth, I really need to say this. Please listen to me for like, two minutes."

"I've got stuff to do."

Oblivious to her avoiding him, he just let everthing go and roll off his tongue as he followed her around the club, explaining it all to her in one breath.

"Look, mostly everything I say doesn't ever come out right, and things didn't last night. I wished it had turned out different, but it didn't. But I know now that you were right, I don't really listen to you, like, listen listen, and I know I should. I surrender, here. I can change, I know I can. I don't want you to think that I'm not trying, but I am. I won't play the show tonight, Ben said they'll do an acoustic set. I don't feel all that great, and I don't think I could even set up my drums the right way, like, I'm seeing three of you. I wish you knew exactly how much I love you, and that you're my weakness. I'd do anything for you, and this is one of those anythings. I'll try to save myself and stop talking, but I'll give you your space because I can tell you need it, but can I lay down somewhere? I'm getting dizzy."

"Yeah, of course, Jer." Bethany said comfortingly, with forgiving eyes. Jeremiah was glad to get it all off his chest. Bethany led him to the green room where there were couches and pillows and he laid down until his head stopped spinning, focusing on the sounds outside the green room of the venue and of the streets. He didn't let the voices in his head take over, nagging him about the things he's done, or didn't do.

For once, his mind wasn't running a hundred miles an hour. His mind was quiet, and he was all alone with his thoughts, which had stopped coming through his brain. What seemed like just a few minutes later, Bethany came in to check on him. She sat on a small part of the couch he was sitting on and she softly shook him awake. She ran her fingers through his dirty blonde hair.

"Hey Jer. Your band is about to go on. How are you feeling?"

"Better than I had been before. How long has it been?"

"A couple hours. I've been checking on you whenever I could. So, what's the plan? Do you want to stay and watch the guys?"

"No. How about we go home?"

"Okay." She smiled back.

She got up off the couch and offered her hand to Jeremiah's. He took it, and they walked out through the crowd to her car, and they went home. There, they sat wrapped up in a blanket with the puppies, hot chocolate, a movie and each other.