Bawk bawk bitch! Issa me! You baguette leader!! I'm here with incorrect quotes because why not? Enjoy!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Peter: I made tea.
Tony: I don't like tea. I prefer black coffee.
Peter: I didn't make you tea. This is mine.
Tony: Then why did you tell me you made tea?
Peter: It's a conversation starter.
Tony: What a horrible conversation starter.
Peter: Oh is it? We're conversing aren't we? Check mate.
————————
Natasha: The quickest way to a man's heart is through the fourth and fifth ribs.
————————
Peter: How the hell did you kill a deer on the road!?
Pepper: I said "Tony! deer!"
Tony: And I said "Yes honey?"
————————
Tony: What are the three stages of life?
Morgan: Birth
Harley: What ever the fuck this is.
Peter: Death
————————
Peter: Dad!
Tony: No, Peter. Please just stop with the stupid questions.
Peter: Do you love me?
Tony, sighing: Of course I do.
Peter: Another question. If I were to cut off my leg and swing it at your head, would I be kicking you or hitting you?
Tony: Goddammit, Peter! Go to sleep!
————————
Peter: I'm starting therapy tomorrow and I've been trying to think of power moves I could make towards the therapist. I've decided to bring a notepad with me and take notes on it whenever they take notes and then eat the paper at the end of the session.
Tony: Peter, this is why you need therapy.
————————
Natasha: I HATE YOU WITH EVERY INCH OF MY BODY!!
Clint: That's.... not a lot of inches.
Natasha:
Clint: I'm sorry! Please don't kill me!
————————
Ned: Hey, Peter, do you remember that time-
Peter: I remember everything that's ever happened to me, and frequently wake up screaming because of it! So, yeah, probably! : )
Ned:
Ned: Jesus Christ. Are you okay?
————————
Steve: What's worse than heartbreak?
Peter: Realizing dragons can't blow out their own birthday candles. : (
Steve:
————————
Reporter: How many kids do you have?
Tony: Biologically, emotionally, or legally?
————————
Peter: In my defense, I was left unsupervised.
YOU ARE READING
Peter Stark One Shots
FanfictionBasically what the title says. Some are Peter Parker but Most are Peter Stark. Also may be Peter being other people's kid. Suggestions are always open so make sure you tell me what you wanna read!!😁 Also, VERY slow updates.. (:
