The Love Score || Zhuo Zhi

93: I Don't Give a Damn

7.34 p.m. I took one more glance at the clock as I laid the two flasks into the bag as neatly and carefully as I could, considering my jumpy and nervous state. Si Yang probably wouldn't return until 9 p.m. tonight due to the extra practice he and his team agreed to. I ran a hand through my hair and found out it was thankfully dry from the quick shower I had to take. I was fortunate that the bus was efficiently on time and that the supermarket was relatively empty on the same day.

I slid my phone and wallet into the pockets of my denim shorts and hastily tied my long hair into a low, unkempt ponytail. Then I grabbed the house keys and switched off the lights of my apartment. With the bag containing the flasks gripped tightly in my hold, I stepped out of my house and shut the door behind me.

While walking briskly towards the bus stop, I scratched my head as I recalled hard where Zhuo Zhi resided. I didn't have the most reliable memory, but I jogged through my mind, trying to concentrate on any special landmarks or road signs I had seen yesterday.

I remembered the direction I had come from his house to get back to mine yesterday, so I simply decided to just board the bus going in that same direction. The moment I would see something familiar, I would alight. I stepped onto the bus and a cool breeze of air-conditioning wafted towards me. I took a seat on the almost-empty bus, hugging the bag to my stomach as I balanced it on my legs, willing for it not to fall or drop to the floor.

Sighing, my eyes averted to the window to look out for Zhuo Zhi's apartment. The decision I made was a bold one, I admit. But I would take responsibility for my actions anyway. Zhuo Zhi had mentioned his parents being away for a week or so, and I assumed that Zhuo Yu was at Guo Zi High's tennis practice. 

Okay, but even if he wasn't, Xiao Yu's not going to kick me out, right?

I frowned at the thought of coming home late. But how late can I get back by? It was only half-past-six; the sky wasn't completely dark yet. The district we all lived in wasn't too big either, it'll only be a matter of how long the busyness will take. I bit my bottom lip when I remembered how Si Yang had reacted yesterday to my late-coming back home. Despite his team abandoning us first, I still had shown up later than what he initially expected. 

Somehow, strangely, I couldn't find the words to tell him that I had gone to his best friend's house for refuge from the rainstorm and instead told him that the bus was slow due to the slippery roads. It felt like the truth choked up my throat when I tried to tell him, making my palms sweat and my shoulders tense. Was this fear? Fear of telling Si Yang that I've been hanging out with his best friend behind his back?

More friendships formed, more feelings grown, more secrets to keep. I scoffed at how I was hiding my siblingship with Si Yang from Zhuo Zhi, but I was hiding my feelings for Zhuo Zhi from Si Yang.

Wait. Feelings? Again? I rolled my tongue around the back of my throat as the thought crossed my mind. Falling for the same guy once more? You really can't learn your lesson, Mu Yue En. 

My finger traced the outline of the flask in my bag as I sighed forlornly at my unfortunate yet seemingly inevitable fate.

♡♡♡

I swallowed my saliva down as I stood in front of the door, my finger hovering an inch above the doorbell. It was a stupid moment of hesitation I had caught myself in, deciding whether or not I should ring it.

The sky was already in a deep shade of purple and was close to fading to black. I blamed the traffic lights-- it was as if they chose to turn red right when the bus was approaching, just to spite me. The light of the lamppost close by illuminated my figure and a long shadow extended from under the soles of my feet along the sidewalk. The undying wind from yesterday's rain whooshed around my legs and through my hair. Autumn was coming soon. My fingers picked at the sleeves of my hooded sweatshirt.