Loving Her

Chapter 23

Two weeks later.

Amrah's POV

I stared up at the ceiling as the tears rolled down the side of my face. The room was in total darkness. The door was flung open and  light filled the room, i groaned as I turned around and covered my face to shield my eyes.

I knew it was no one other than my mum's cousin, Ya Halima.

"Amrah it's twelve and you're still sleeping? Please wake up and take a shower."

I nodded weakly and went to the bathroom. Looking at myself in the mirror I was a shadow of my self. I had lost so much weight, the night wear I was wearing used to fit me but now it dropped down my neck and the trousers were falling off my waist. My skin looked pale and tear stained and my eyes swollen and bloodshot.

I looked ridiculous.

I closed my eyes as more tears came down from my face.

I held my chest as I prayed silently to God to grant me the ability to bear all of this. Because God knows this is too all too much for me. I've spent every single night crying my eyes out to the point where I didn't think I had no more tears left.

I felt immerse pain each time I remembered that my wedding was coming up in a few days.

Wedding preparations were going on at home. Tomorrow Naseer's family will be bringing the wedding gifts given to the bride and a few relatives were here to prepare to receive them. Only a few people were invited for the actual wedding, there is no event or anything no even a bridal shower nothing. Just the wedding fatiha on Saturday.

A lot of my relatives were shocked at the sudden wedding some of my cousins messaged about bridesmaids outfits and the events and I told them no, they were very surprised.

My wedding. It feels so weird to even say that. I never thought my wedding will be the worst day of my life and that it will be the day I dread the most. I never thought my wedding will be with a man I detest so much.

Two weeks ago when Adnan and I went on that amazing picnic, I forgot about everything for a while I pretended like everything in my life was perfect. I pretended that my life wasn't at the brink of getting ruined forever. That was until I received a call from daddy, he asked me to come back home and that it was urgent he didn't have to tell me. I already knew.

It happened that Naseer insisted on us getting engaged and the wedding happening soon after and of course daddy had no choice but to accept.

I went blank for a second. My heart started racing. It was really happening.

I had to go back home. I realized how much I was hurting myself letting myself fall deeper and deeper for him knowing that I was knowing I'll be married to Naseer in a matter of weeks.

Even for him, It was best to just let it be. I saw how hurt he was and it hurt me too but I know that's the right thing to do for my sanity.

The more I see him and get closer to him the more my heart breaks. The one thing I wish I regret is not telling him how I feel about him. I needed to let him know that I did love him back. But what's the point, it's no use.

Two days after I came back, I was engaged to Naseer and that was when my world came crashing down, all the hopes I had for some sort of miracle happening came crashing down. I couldn't hold my self any more. I've cried like I've never cried before.

**Ever since the engagement, Naseer has been extra nice I know he's only doing it to make me forgive him and whatever but honestly that's And I just haven't even had the energy to fight him.**

The knock on the door interrupted me and I quickly got in the tub, bathed and came out. I brought out a simple gown and wore it. I was combing out my hair which looks like a beds nest when the door opened and Hanan came into the room. "There's a lady out there looking for you."