My Greatest Downfall (Published under Summit Media)

Final Chapter

Part 2 of 2

Her Side

Watching him as he turned his back from me. Tears escaped from my eyes. Telling the truth is widely considered as honorable and just, I have no fear of taking responsibility of my action. Lying to him is painful. I often hear people say that I'd much rather have someone tell me a painful truth than have someone lie to me. But in my case, I decided to lie because it will be appropriate and inevitable.

I glimpsed once again. Sorry. I'm really sorry. I didn't deserve you. Again, my tears were falling endlessly. Ginusto ko 'to dapat panindigan ko. I was ashamed of myself, I was his baggage. After all the trouble I gave to him. Ito pa ang igaganti ko? Sobrang kapal naman ata ng mukha ko. I ditched him on our wedding because a heavyhearted scenario came.

I coud hear the wedding bells. Today, I was very excited. Excited to exchange vows with him. I didn't prepare any wedding vows, mas gusto ko na on the spot ang sasabihin ko. Yes, I could feel the wedding jitters. Kinakabahan ako ng sobra. My stylist made her way to my back to zipped the zipper on my gown. I smiled as I see my reflection on the human size mirror.

"Sobrang ganda ko na ba?" tanong ko sa mga nag-aayos sa akin. All of them were smiling from ear to ear. They gave me a thumbs up and claps.

"Congratulations! Best wishes po!" they cheered. My make-up artist did a light make up on me. Mas gusto ko kasi na simple lang ang ayos ko. My hair was formed into a high bun. My wedding gown perfectly highlights my shape and curves. I had a pair of diamond earrings. I looked great.

Minutes after, Terrence called me. Grabe lang, sumosobra ang pagkaclingy n'ya. Natawa ako bigla as I answered his call. His voice makes me so comfortable. Sobrang lambing ng boses n'ya which is slightly indifferent. Nag-blush ako as he said he missed me. Kinilig ako at gusto kong tumili kaso naalala kong may mga kasama akong tao. Nakakawala ng poise. He bid good bye but I was still smiling. Pucha, gusto ko atang manampal ng mga nag-aasikaso sa akin dahil tuwang tuwa ako sa kakornihan ni babylove.

They did their final retouch. Noong matapos na ang pag-aayos sa akin ay lumabas na ako ng suite ko para lumabas ng hotel. The hallways were spacious. Lahat ata ng staff ng hotel ay ngumingiti at kino-congrats ako. Ikakasal na nga talaga ako.

"Huwag ka muna magtataray ha?" narinig ko bigla ang boses ng aking mahal sa utak ko. Ayun kasi ang paalala n'ya sa akin palagi. Masstress daw ako at magkakawrinkles. Ano ba 'yan, hindi naman ako papangit e. Kapag pumangit ako, kawawa naman ang mga pangit. Tss!

The driver wearing a fitted tuxedo open the Audi's door for me. Terrence insisted a limousine pero ang sabi ko huwag na. Masyado ng common. Mas bet ko nga kung isang sportscar ang bridal car ko para astig. Tapos, ako ang magdadrive diba? Edi walang late late.

The drive went smooth, sobrang saya ko noong tumunog na naman ang phone ko. I get my phone inside my tiny bag and got wide eyes when I see an unregistered number.

My mind was arguing whether to answer the phone or to ditch the call. But after a couple of seconds of ringing, I answered the call. "Who is this?" I addressed.

I heard a sigh. I frowned. "Who is this?" I asked once again. I heard a familiar voice on the other line.

"It's Liza. Liam's mom." she perorated. My forehead creases as I stare blankly at my phone. My mind was asking why? "Please take care of Liam." she recited and I remained silent.

"Are you crying Tita?" I asked. Somehow, I felt nervous dahil hindi ko alam kung bakit ang gloomy ng boses n'ya.  I heard her sobs. It echoes right through my ear. I am so puzzled.

"Please talk to Liam, Trish. He needs a transplant and I am doing this for him.." I never got scared in my life. But that moment, I tear escaped from my eyes when I finally knew what is happening. A loud crashing car sound echoed. I almost got an heart attack. I was petrified. Because I know that;

She is the donor. She committed suicide for his son. The rest was history..

I was on the hospital's hallway; sitting on the cold pavement. Napaupo na lang ako habang dinadigest ang pangyayari. Kasalukuyang ginagawa ang surgery ni Liam ngayon. Iyak lang ako ng iyak habang suot suot itong wedding gown ko. I am supposed to be happy today but it turned out drowning myself in despair.

I couldn't think clearly, sobrang sikip ng dibdib ko. Someone had sacrificed her life. A flashing image of Tristan appeared. He saved me from death and I should't have wasted it. Hindi ko magawang iwanan si Liam habang nag-uundergo s'ya ng surgery. He was now alone and hindi ko alam kung paano ko sasabihin sa kanya kung sino ang mismong donor n'ya. I was fucked up.

Liam is adopted as he said. His father died two years ago. And I couldn't bear leaving him alone today. Hindi ko naman kayang magsaya habang may isang nahihirapan. No. I just can't. Sobrang hirap ng sitwasyon ko.

Wala na nga akong pakialam kung pagtinginan ako ng tao sa paligid ko. Wala akong paki. Napatingin ako sa wall clock. Hindi ko na naisip ang mismong kasal ko. Sobrang sama ko.

After all Liam did to me. This is the time that he needs me. Kahit ngayong araw lang. Hindi n'ya kakayanin ito ng mag-isa. 'Yung kasal namin pwedeng iposponed pero 'yung nangyayari ngayon ay sobrang hirap. Ano na lang ang sasabihin ko kapag tinanong n'ya ako kung sino ang nagdonate ng organ? Do I need to slapped on his face that it is his mother?! No. That's painful. Iniisip ko pa nga lang kung paano sasabihin sa kanya ang bagay na iyon ay nahihirapan na ako. Ano pa kung magising na s'ya?

I could hear the tic-tac of the clock. Sobrang gulo ng isip ko. I am supposed to be happy. I am supposed to exchange wedding vows. Lastly, we were supposed to become one.

I loved you. I said to him. Sobrang sakit para sabihin ang bagay na iyon. I was lying. Hindi s'ya ang taong sobrang matanong. He stared at me and then he smiled bitterly. It hurts. Ayun na lang siguro ang way ko para mas lalo s'yang saktan at kamuhian n'ya ako. After all the trouble and shame I gave him. I deserve tying my neck with sorrow.

I loved him till life and till life after death. Months after, I am carrying a lifetime happiness. A living remembrance of him. I found a double strips.