"Don't you dare fucking talk to me like that." I snapped at the seething boy in front of me.
"Like what, princess? Like you're full of shit? Someone had to say it!" He yelled back.
"No, don't talk to me like you're better than me! You and I are the...
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★★★
"Any luck at Pope's?" I asked JJ when he walked in, and he nodded. "Yeah, I talked to him for a bit. He's still really shaken up about everything. What about Kie?"
"No luck. Her mom decided to basically slam the door in my face, and chose now to express her disapproval for all of us. I mean, now? After our friends went missing? How fucked up is that?" I asked angrily.
He sighed, "I had a feeling her mom would be an asshole, I just thought she'd have a little sympathy."
"Apparently not," I huffed.
JJ suddenly got closer to me, sitting down next to where I was and looked at me kindly. "I've been meaning to ask you, how are you feeling about all of this? What are you thinking, it's so hard to tell sometimes," He said.
I shrugged, not really sure how to iterate to him that I was feeling hopelessly and incredibly lost.
"I don't know what to think anymore. I refuse to give up though, I can't. They're not dead, I can feel it," I said.
JJ gave me a weird look that I could tell would turn into a conversation I didn't want to have, so before he could say anything, and he was about to, I cut him off.
"Have you ever had such a strong gut feeling that ignoring it would be doing yourself a disservice? I feel that feeling. I want to believe in something, I need to believe in something," I said simply, and he gave me a sympathetic look.
"I just want to prepare you for the possibility that they're dead. I know it's not what any of us want to hear, but Pope and Kie are already grieving. They kind of... accepted this. You're being a little bit difficult-"
"Difficult? Because I want to believe my friends aren't dead?"
"They're my friends too," JJ sighed, and I nodded. "I'm aware. I was just saying that I want to not be so cynical. I liked optimism, and if I give up on the idea they could still be out there, I'll completely fall off. I don't want to have nothing to believe in."
"I know, you keep mentioning all this 'believing' shit, but listen... John B. and Sarah are gone. Gone, okay? You have to accept that. Maybe they're dead, maybe they're missing, I don't know," JJ snapped, and I sighed.
I didn't want to get mad, he was hurting more than I was. His best friend was gone, and I couldn't imagine what he was feeling.
"I'm sorry, I took it too far," I said genuinely, and his hard facial features softened. "It's fine, I'm sorry for yelling," He said.
