Laments of Broken Strings (Arte del Amor #1)

PROLOGUE

It's four in the morning.

Hindi ko na matandaan kung kailan yung huling gabi na nakatulog ako nang maayos, kung babalikan ko'y parang sobrang tagal na.

Sa bawat gabing hindi ako makatulog, nilulunod ko ang sarili ko sa mga libro at nagsusunog ng kilay sa pag-aaral. It's better than drowning in my thoughts that will eventually consume everything I have.

Konti na lang.

"Nyx, subukan mo namang magpahinga." My mom said one midnight when she tried video calling me and saw that I was studying when I answered.

Matagal ko nang sinubukan iyon. "I have exams tomorrow, Ma." I lied, but only to lessen her worries. I know she misses me back home, I do not want to make her more worried than she already is. Considering the state I was in when I left.

I don't want to rest.

Rest means remembering, and remembering is the last thing I want to do.

As usual, I went to school restless.

Bitbit ko sa likod ko ang isang gitarang isang taon ko nang kasama. Never did I leave it in the past year. Wala akong maalalang araw kung kailan ko siya iniwanan.

Hindi na rin bago sa akin yung mga tingin ng mga nadadaanan ko, probably because I'm always alone and nobody really knows me. Isa pa, kakalipat ko lang dito this school year. They seem to like new people, or intrigued by them rather.

If this was three years ago, I would have been friends with everybody by now. Siguro'y ako pa ang unang magpapakilala at lalapit sa kanila. Pero hindi.

Everything has changed and I am in no position nor do I have the power to change that. If I could, life would be as easy as counting one to three.

I entered my first class and since it's still early, wala pa yung professor. Medyo maingay na sa loob dahil kahit wala namang nagsisigawan, may kanya-kanya silang mga usapan.

"Hala! Puyat ka ba?" salubong sa akin ni Ryna nang nakaupo na ako sa tabi niya. Sa lahat ng mga kaklase ko, siya ang pinakadumadaldal sa akin.

Am I to be offended that she assumed that? Nonetheless, I just nodded, because I don't really know how to talk to people but she doesn't seem to mind so she continued, "Sabi sa kabilang section may chance na magbigay ng surprise quiz si Sir ngayon! Hindi ako nakapagreview!" she said, halatang may panic sa boses.

"Eh, kung sinabi na pala ng ibang section, hindi na surprise?" singit ng isa naming kaklase. "Nabibigla ako ngayon kaya counted 'yon!"

I tried to recall whether I studied for this subject last night, and heaved a sigh of relief when I recalled I did. "You should study, may ten minutes ka pa naman." I told her, but she widened her eyes at napatayo.

"Sumagot si Nyx!" sigaw niya kaya napatingin ang buong klase sa amin, sa akin. Tinabunan ko ng kamay ko ang mukha ko dahil sa kahihiyan.

"I was so scared that I've been so insensitive talking to you when you could've been deaf the whole time!" one of my classmates, too honest in speaking his mind.

Nagkaroon ng komosyon sa loob ng classroom dahil lang doon. Isa-isa nang lumapit ang mga kaklase ko sa akin, nagtatanong ng kung ano-ano na para bang sinusulit ang boses ko.

"Why did you transfer here, really?"

"Personal reasons."

"Do you not like us or something? That's why you waited until today to speak to us?" That's an exaggeration because group works which I do not appreciate, exist in this school so I have no choice but to interact with others.