Phoenix's pov:
We finally got back from Dairy Queen and and I was definitely exhausted "I'm going to bed guys, night." i told them as I walked up the stairs, I heard them all say goodnight in reply and someone began following me upstairs. I walked into my room taking my Bluetooth speaker out of the bathroom and put it into my pocket, I walked straight past Tj and went to the attic. I locked the door and set up my speaker as the the beginning of the memory by mayday parade covered Tj's yells. I lent against the window and listened to the lyrics of the song, trying to stay calm and not breakdown..
**flashback**
We walked into Dairy Queen and dad went to get our ice creams and shit. we sat in a booth in the corner and began talking, we all questioned Tj on what had happened through out the past few days. dad walked back over with our ice creams and Tj got up to go to the bathroom, he got about halfway there before he was stopped by a blonde woman that I vaguely recognised.. Tj stood there talking to her for a few minuets before she launched herself at him, latching her lips onto his and ignoring his struggles to push her away. when monte went to save him it hit me, she was the girl at the park.. I stood up from my seat and walked calmly over to the girl as she yelled abuse at monte and Tj tried to call her off "Tj could you please call off your attack dog? I'm sure monte doesn't want whatever Sti's she has." i snapped at him, my comment made her shut up and she glared at me, I never let my death stare waver as she began to go on about some utter bull shit "listen honey, I don't know exactly what you think you are, but surely you shouldn't be able to tell Tj here what to do, it's clear that whatever you have going on between the two of you is nothing compared to what we had, and I know he'd drop a skank like you in seconds! Especially for someone like me." she twirled her cheap extensions around her five dollar manicured finger. I honestly felt as if I was on auto pilot as the words tumbled out of my mouth "really 'honey' if anyone's a skank here it's you, feel free to go back to whatever aids clinic you crawled out of and maybe get yourself treated! And while your at it maybe you could discover your natural hair! Cleopatra called she wants her wig back love." I smirked as her jaw dropped "oh my god I can't believe you just compared my hair to a chocolate bar! And one that I haven't even heard of before as well?!" I rolled my eyes at her stupidity, surely obviously skipped school cause to be honest her job as a hooker was pretty secure either way! "Oh my god Tj she just called me a hooker! are you going to say something?!" I suppressed a giggle as I hadn't meant to call her a hooker out loud but oh well if she heard that's a bonus! "Actually I am going to say something." Tj said bluntly and I chewed my lip waiting for him to chose her over me "id like you to fuck off out of my life sonya. seriously we slept together once and now I can't fucking get rid of you! I've changed my number three times since I first tried to get rid of you and some how you've got it again and again! Just fuck off seriously, you've tried to fuck up mine and Phoenix's relationship to many times now leave." I looked up from the ground and the scene unfolding in front of me now. suddenly she ran out of Dairy Queen and all I could do was laugh..
**end of flashback**
Maybe she was right... Maybe I don't deserve Tj... I've made him suffer more than anyone ever should... I left him without even putting up a fight... its my fault he was in that awful psych ward, it was my fault that he didn't want to be here anymore. it was all my fault... I leant further into the window and looked out over the city, the city that had been my home for almost about six months, the city that had undoubtedly changed my life.. a city that I really needed to leave..
Tj's pov:
"Max have you got a spare key to your attic?" I asked trying to sound calm, he nodded and Robert looked confused "we have an attic?" I rolled my eyes, somehow Robert had gotten ditzier since he moved in with Max, Max shrugged and went to get the key. "how comes it's locked?" He asked me "erm phoenix is up there and she locked it." he nodded again "you shouldn't worry about her though, she goes up there all the time, she likes to think. some bull shit about being closer to the sky helping her think I guess." I didn't reply just took the key and ran up the stairs to the small cupboard like room and shoving the key into the lock, I managed to do it with enough force to knock the key out on the other side "so here I am I'm trying.." I heard blink 182 always blaring from the hatch above me. I closed the door and locked it again making sure that nobody would walk in just incase something had happened and she didn't want them all to see. I climbed up the thin stairs, shitting myself every time they creaked and opened the hatch to the attic. I climbed through as the song changed to world around me, the first thing I saw was phoenix leaning against the big bay window her eyes closed and her breathing shallow, I walked over to her and sat down. "you okay baby?" I asked making her jump, she shook her head and leant against my chest "what's up?" I asked her genuinely confused "just thinking about what sonya said.." I sighed and hugged her closer "don't even think about telling me to ignore it you know I can't do that!" She added just as I went to say something "phoenix but you know none of it was true! Surely you can't think that she's better than you." I felt her shrug and I glared out the window "it's not my fault that she makes me feel insecure I mean she's so much... she's just... she's better than me Tj! I don't understand how you can be with me when she's so much better than me at everything, in EVERY way!" She shuffled away from me and she regained her original position and chewed my lip letting the stress get the best of me.. "Tj I can't stay here anymore." I lent my head back against the wall and bit down harder on my lip "Tj stop it you'll make yourself bleed." she told me and I stopped, I looked out through the window "I can see why your up here so much." I said quietly and she nodded "I'm going downstairs, I need to talk to dad." I nodded closing my eyes again and leaning against the window. I heard her walking down the stairs and curled up against the window.. I finally gave up and walked downstairs, I sat down on the couch and listened to Max, Robert and Phoenix's conversation "so your saying that you need to get away from here?" Robert asked and I heard Max begin tapping on the ground with his foot "fine we'll go on a family holiday, just the three of us, kay?" Max asked the two of them and I heard them agree, phoenix slightly hesitantly. I decided that I'd have to talk to her, sooner rather than later. so I picked up my balls and walked into the kitchen "phoenix can we like, take a walk or something?" I waited for her to reply and when she said nothing I went and got my shoes on. "Craig have you got my car keys?" I asked and he threw them to me. I caught them and walked to the door. I opened it and saw phoenix stood by my car "so you decided you want to talk now did you?" I snapped and unlocked my car "yup now when your done being a whiny bitch I'd like to find out what you wanted to talk about." i sighed and started the car and drove to my house. "treehouse?" I asked and she shrugged "whatever." she said and I unlocked the front door. I walked straight through to the kitchen and unlocked the back door. I walked out and climbed up the ladder. I sat down and waited for phoenix to appear in the doorway when she finally did I couldn't help but smile at the fact she was wearing my black Metallica hoodie "so what did you want to talk about?" She asked as she pulled her knees up to her chest. I sat in the same position and rested my head on my knees "what does this mean?" I tried not to sound like a five year old desperate for answers "what does what mean?" Was the reply I got, this triggered a sigh from me and I managed to begin to explain "what does this mean for us? Is this it are we done or??" I could practically see her brain whirring and I desperately clung on to the idea that she might want to stay together "I don't know Tj.. I think that while I've got some time away I need to think, I need to think about everything and sort out my problems before I can commit myself to us.." I nodded trying not to let this get to me "when are you going?" I quizzed lightly and she smiled slightly, barely even visible "tomorrow." I nodded "where?" Don't be to far away.. at least still be in the usa.. "Just Florida. we've got to be back for warped." I spread a fake smile across my face and tried not to overkill the happy tone in my voice "well hope you figure everything out nix, remember i'm always here." she nodded and walked over to me, she hugged me and we left the tree house, beginning the drive back to Max's..
