This is Us

3.Temptations

It kept getting colder. That's how I knew school was closing in on us. It was cold enough for it to snow, and I wasn't even tryna feel it.

  I grabbed my expensive ass peacoat, cause ain't nobody got the time for that!

  I'm in the mirror just looking at myself,"He doesn't really love you, you know that right? You a ugly ass, dirty ass faggot who suck dick all day! How many times he fucked you in the booty? Huh? Too many for you to shit correctly!", and now you've met my older brother, Antoine.  Tall light skin muthafucka, dreads, a fucked up set of teeth, and had a body oder that could clear an amusement park!

  "You know, one day Antoine, you gone be here, 46 years old, still smelling like you got mildew on ya balls, with no friends, and no job. Now get the fuck out my face before I fuck you up!"

  "Faggot you can't beat me, I'll knock you the fuck", I cut him off," and I told you to stop using that word! You know how I fucking feel about that stupid ass word!" I hate when people call other people" faggot", it's not a cool or hip word. It's just as evil and cruel as the word" nigger". But black people can stand up for being called a bigger, but the L.G.B.T community can't feel no type of way when someone calls them a faggot?

  I left before I had to fuck his life up.

Oreo lived in South Trenton, I lived in West Trenton, which was like 15-20 minutes away from each other. I stopped at my Aunt's house. Everyone was sleep so I went to the corner store across the street before I went to see Oreo.

  "Jeremy..", I said to the boy who worked there, who also was FINE as hell. "Wassup, boy!", he was always turnt up for no reason.

I told him that I wanted 2 Italian hoagies (like subway sandwiches, but better, longer, and cheaper), and one with no tomatoes, I hate.... tomatoes.

   He says,"gotchu, but you gotta help me real quick, I need the onions, they in the little box in the back, I can't reach 'em." Mmmhm nigga, "you can't reach 'em" bitch don't play-In my head.

  "Sure", I bitched out, okay? Shit!

I walked to the back and reached for the onions, when I feel something come grab me from behind,  and it doesn't feel like Oreo!

  I look back and it's Jeremy. "Sssshhhhhh. I put the" closed" sign on the door. My dad's gone. I know you want it as bad as I do." He says in my ear.

"Jeremy, you know I gotta boyfriend!" I say trying to get him off me.

"Shut up! Man you know you want this dick! Get on ya knees and suck this dick!" He lets me go and pulls down his pants and all I can see is a big hard dick.

"I'm not sucking yo dick! What the fuck is wrong wit you!? You know Oreo gone fuck you up he find out you did this shit! ", I'm tryna push him off me but he's stronger than I am! 

  He gets a hold of my coat and throws me on the ground.

  In my head I'm just saying, "this is it, I'm about to get raped." I'm crying on the floor, praying for somebody to get him off me!

"Jeremy don't do this! Stop!", he's got his draws down now, this is it.

 

  "A yo! Get the fuck off of him!"Oreo.... he came.

I roll over and see Oreo and Jeremey going at it. I know this is a really fucked up moment but I couldn't help but think' "Damn,  I got two niggas fighting over me! ", then I come back and realize that I was about to get raped.

  Oreo had him in a headlock, I got up and kicked him in his stomach.

"You. muthafucka. How. Dare. You. Try. To. Rape. Me!?" With each pause another kick.

"OKAY! OKAY! OKAY", Jeremy says as I kick him one more time, " I'm sorry", he catches his breathe," I'm sorry."

  Oreo let him out the lock and then grabbed him by his shirt, "If I EVER catch you trying some stupid shit like this, ON MY MOTHA,  YOU DEAD! Do you fucking here me?" Oreo yells in his face.

  He made me feel so safe now, like whenever I walk with him, I've got an angel to protect me.

"Yeah, man! Shit." Jeremy says with blood dripping out his mouth.

  We walked out and I went to his house. He sat me down and asked if I was okay.

"Yeah, I'm just a lil thrown off. Why the fuck would he do that?" I lean on Oreo's shoulder and he wraps his big arms around me.

  "It's just something about you that makes me want to do things for you. I can't control it... I just... want to take care of you, protect you... you know?  I just don't want anything to happen to you. I would go crazy babe." Wow, go crazy huh? Keep talking, I know he can't be this perfect, just fuck up again! 

  Fuck up so I can know this isn't a dream. Fuck up so I know I'm still alive, and I haven't died and went to heaven! Just fuck up so I can know!! Just..... fuck up.

"Why were you at the store in the first place?", I asked.

"I was hungry, and something was telling me I needed to go to the store. I'm glad I did go.",

  "Me too.", I said.

   I fell asleep on his chest that night. I felt so safe.

   I can't remember what that feels Like anymore... to be safe, that is.

I don't feel safe and wrapped up in warmth.

   I don't have ny angel here with me anymore.

   Damn.