chapter 4

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                           Think of heartbreak.

It's like you can feel your chest constrict to the pain and your head hurts from all the crying, your whole face is red and you're just tired. You try to sleep but everytime that moment comes back to mind, you feel it again. You feel it envelope you again. And you're crying. Again.

The worst thing is, you can never hate him. Now matter how much he broke your heart, you can never hate him. Eventhough he doesn't remember you, you can never hate him. Even when you see him shamelessly flirting with your twin brother, you can never hate him.

When you fell, you gave it all. And he caught you.

''I was never there when he fell'' Max whimpered suddenly, waking his twin brother who was about to doze off. Harry didn't want to leave Max awake, crying by himself. He couldn't ignore that, It was his brother, his twin brother.

''What?'' Harry asked, more like mumbled as he blinked to adjust to the light.

''He-he got into an accident and I wasn't there-  if I was here? he wouldn't get into that accident! I would have been with him 24/7 and he- maybe I would be getting amnesia too but maybe that would be a good thing, maybe it would be easier than remembering when your other half doesn't'' Max's shoulders shook as a sob escaped him, tears running down his cheeks. 

All Harry could do was hold him. He couldn't tell Max if it will get better. He couldn't tell Max that Nate will remember. Because he didn't know and not knowing was all of man kind's fear. Harry could only hope. 

By Sunday morning, the brothers didn't speak about it.

+

''Mom is asking you to come back'' Harry said one Saturday evening when he visited. The four of them, Niall, Harry, Max and Louis were at the park. Max's eyes widened. 

''No''

''She said its immature that you're acting like because of a boy and-''

''It's not just any boy, Harry! Its Nate'' Max stood up, eyes wide with fury.

''Yeah I understand that, Max! But by you being here and not going to school, what good is there? She said she gives you permission to come every weekened to see him but you have to come back. Your life is back in London, Max'' Harry sighed. 

Niall and Louis exchanged looks as they studied what Max would say. He was about to protest again, Harry could see it but a loud familiar laugh broke them out of their states as they turned towards the park entrance. 

It was Nate. And a boy. The boy had an arm around Nate, pressing him to his side, his mouth at Nate's ear. Whatever he was seeing made the smaller boy blushing and Max was about to storm up to them when Harry and Louis restrained him.

''Max, don't'' Harry warned.

Max gritted his teeth and clenched his fists as they dissapeared behind a tree. He could see the boy pushing Nate and leaning down to-

He turned his head towards the three boys.

''Okay. I'll go back. When are we going? Now?''

''Tomorrow actually, me and Niall-''

''Okay, fine tomorrow. Louis, wanna help me pack up?'' Max didn't wait for an answer as he stormed off, hands flying to his hair, pushing it back, pulling at it. He tried to breathe, He tried to sing along to some of his comforting favourite songs, he almost tripped.

''You can go back now, Harry'' Niall said, watching as Louis trying to comfort Max.

''No Niall, we can-''

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