The Mesh (Raura)

Chapter 28

I speed up to exit the building, needing some fresh air. My head is starting to hurt. I can't believe I was the one who had to be gifted with this spectacular information. My whole life sucks. I never know what I need to know and somehow always uncover the things I was never supposed to find out.

"Wait, Laura. ", Ross grabs my wrist and turns me around once we're on the outside. My eyes are wide with just confirmed disappointment in the world. In someone I thought was the closest thing to a friend I'd say. "Why are you saying that?"

"Why?", I shake my head. "You're gonna tell me it's not true? Aren't you disappointed in him?"

"I'm more surprised than disappointed. To me, it was a shock that Lydia would be with Ethan. Like how? And only a few days after we broke up. "

"So you only had your ego hurt? You don't think the right thing to do is break in and curse him out for the sake of justice?", I bluntly say. Our eyes are burning into one another.

Ross sighs. "Look. He's a grown-up guy. I have nothing to be depressed about. I feel sorry for Lexi but who Ethan fucks is not my problem. "

"Yeah. I forgot it's normal for you men to draw someone in and be half-assed about the relationship. "

"It's not like that. ", Ross shakes his head. "Not with everyone, at least. "

"Not with everyone? You cheated on someone too. I always wanted to ask. How does it feel? ", my voice is now harsh just like my words.

Ross is taken back. "I haven't slept with anyone while I was with Lydia. "

"We kissed. Just because you didn't sleep with someone else doesn't mean you ain't a cheater. Even a thought of being with someone other than the person who's with you is a small cheat. That's what comes from not being honest with your feelings and being commited to your mind. It all slaps you in the face later. ", I say.

"So you are honest with yourself all the time?", he glares at me. "That's why you find it fun to insult me right now. You said so. "

"This isn't the least bit fun, Ross. For Christ's sake. I'm trying to prevent bad things from happening to us. You heard them yourself. I know human beings have their own instincts but since we created this illusion called feelings all we could do is respect them. If a person knows they can't commit to someone, the least they could do is not be with anyone. That way they'll be neutral and no one will be hurt. "

"What does that have to do with anything? We are talking about Ethan and Lexi here. "

"It does have to do with our situation. If you were ready to cheat on Lydia, how can I tell if you won't cheat on me too?", I finally let the words out of my brain cages.

Ross' face turns into a big frown. "That's because I like you. I couldn't control myself that night. You know I felt nothing for Lydia for a few months already. "

"Yet you fucked her and led her on. That's what I'm talking about. You should've come clear with yourself a long time before you let yourself cheat. Am I right?"

Ross keeps quiet, just staring at me speechless. I kind of feel guilty but I needed to get it off my chest. These thoughts have been bringing me down ever since the night we kissed on that terrace.

My eyes finally give his heart mercy as they soften. Hands attach themselves to the warm jacket on his sides. "It's alright. I understand your situation. I just wish you wouldn't let yourself drop to Ethan's level. Whatever you have on your mind, let me know the second it appears. Please don't ever pretend or lie to me. If you ever like someone else... just let me know. I'll be sad but I'll bear it. But lying, I can't accept being lied to. I cannot accept living through the same hell as my mother. "