No Happy Endings.| ✓

17.

Ooh, ooh, ooh, the reason I hold on
Ooh, ooh, ooh, 'cause I need this hole gone
Funny you're the broken one but,
I'm the only one who needed saving
'Cause when you never see the light it's hard to know which one of us is caving.

~Rihanna

(A/n: you know how this works♥️.)
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Today was little Lily's funeral,

words and tears cannot express how sad I feel.
When we arrived at the place the funeral was being held at,

I saw little Lily lying in the coffin peacefully.
I was thinking of how I right now have no reason to live.

Why does this world hate me so much that the one person I had to live for,
is taken away from me?

I had grown so close to her, so close that when I was told about what happened to her,
it was worse than being abused and tortured by you.

It felt like a sharp knife was being stabbed and twisted again and again.

Someone please help me,

it feels like I'm being drowned, it feels like I'm being stabbed again and again in the same place. It's too overwhelming.

Why can't I be put out of this misery...

Why can't I live my life the way I want to live it?

Why am I still alive?

Why am I going through all of this?

Am I not going through enough?

So many questions but very few answers.

Do I honestly deserve this?

Is this what you wanted?

Are you finally happy?

Do you want me to do something else?

Are you satisfied?

I wish you never left Val...you were my best friend. I wish I was actually loved by someone.

I wish I had true friends.

I wish I could be happy again.

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