Loving You is Hard, Especially When I Hate You.

'The End'

her other tattoo :) ---->

CHAPTER 32

“So.” Zayn said sitting back down with the bowl of popcorn. “what's up with the tattoo?” he popped a few pieces into his mouth smiling. My hand went over the four birds that were forever running along my neck. I smiled at the memory of getting them- not because of the pain oh god no but because of the reason for getting them. They were symbolic. So was the other ones, but this one meant a lot more than the others. Zayn snapped his fingers in front of my face trying to get my attention. “you going to tell me or..?”

I laughed clearly I went into my on little world. “nothing, I just thought it looked cool.” I lied. It felt stupid to keep it to myself, but hey I didn't need to tell him if I didn't want to. He shrugged it off grabbing the remote and turning on the movie. Josh jumped onto the seat next to me grabbing some popcorn off Zayn.

“she told me the same story,” Josh said randomly. “But I'll find out eventually.” he pointed at me narrowing his eyes. I laughed pushing his face away. I didn't really mind telling people. I just felt like they would all think it was stupid. So I just said it looked cool so I got it. But that wasn't the case at all. I looked down at the infinity tattoo I had on my wrist. That I had gotten after my birds tattoo. It was just symbolic of pretty much everything. Everything that I could trust in, my friends and family that they would stay with me forever. No matter what. “so what are we watching?”

“Home Alone 2 I think.” I told Josh, I turned towards the TV to see everyone in the movie packing for the big trip for the holidays. I loved this movie. I found all the booby-traps hilarious and always loved seeing all the yummy food Kevin ordered during his stay at the Plaza.

The Plaza, I remembered when I stayed there. It was much more modernized since the movie. But it brought back so many memories. The week we stayed there, the wonderful week with Liam, the first time he told me he loved me everything. Tears started to well up in my eyes as I started to remember everything after the trip. The awkward few days back, finding out what he did for me, then the fight. I started to feel a bit guilty about the fight. If I hadn't over reacted then I might still be with Liam. But I didn't want to still love him. After all this time, and then seeing him this morning. He obviously hated me now, and yet, I still loved him. I could never stay mad with him for long. Sure I'm quite pissed with the things he said. But still.. something about it after thinking back.. it just seemed so … I don't know. I looked over to Josh and then Zayn. I sighed getting up and walking into the kitchen to grab a soda.

“something wrong?” someone said behind me while I had my head in the fridge looking for something to drink. I grabbed a Dr. Pepper opened it and stood up straight looking over my shoulder to see Josh leaning against the counter. I took a sip of my soda walking over to him.

“just remembering stuff.” I mumbled looking at my soda.

“good or bad?”

“a little bit of both?” I told him. He nodded understanding. He had always been there for me through my emotional roller coaster. From when I went from upset to angry back to upset to completely depressed and then finally normal. And he went through it all. He was always there when I needed him the most. He never got annoyed with me, never said anything. He always understood and gave me space or just gave me a cuddle when I needed it. He got my mind of things when I was over thinking. He even encouraged me to go for auditions that I thought I would never get and got anyway. He was truly someone I could call my best friend.

“hey you want to get out of here for a bit?” Josh asked, I looked up at him nodding before walking into the front door and grabbing my jacket. “Zayn we are going out for a bit feel free to stay and watch the rest of the movie.” Josh told Zayn who just waved as us stuffing his mouth with popcorn. Charmer, isn't he?