Twisted {Jacob Black}

Mental Letters

{written for my friend's birthday}

Dear Jacob,

I'm sorry.
There's nothing more important that I have to say to you, at least I don't think there is, but I guess we'll find out. It's not easy to mentally write letters to people because you're stuck in a cellar and all you have is images of them in your mind, so cut me some slack.
But I'm saying sorry, Jacob, for everything. I'm sorry I yelled at the movie theatre, I'm sorry I was being so rude, I'm sorry it seemed like I didn't want you to be happy, because I do, even if your happiness doesn't involve me. I'm sorry, too, that we fell out at first, and that I didn't bother to try and figure out what was going on with you before i started yelling at the beach that day. Most of all, Jacob, I'm sorry I ever met you. Because if I die, if they kill me, you'll have a hell of a lot of unnecessary pain. It could've all been avoided if I'd never been adopted by Jason and Belle. If I'd never moved to forks and met the sweet, stuttering boy with the long dark hair, if I'd never chosen to hang around with Sam, if I'd never become so close to you, then you'd be without all of this drama and heartbreak. Maybe you'd be slightly more normal. Maybe you'd have a high school girlfriend who cheated on you and broke your heart. Maybe you'd be with her, the blonde girl from the movie theatre? I can only apologise that I never bothered to ask for her name, because I'm sure she's great. But maybe you'd go on to love her, to be with her, and it breaks my heart to think it even though we were never together, but maybe you'd marry her. Maybe someday, far in the future, you'd have a family. And Jacob, despite all of the little sadness streaks in your life, nothing would be as horrifically tragic as having your best friend murdered. You'd never know all of that pain.

You'd be happy, and that's all I could ever hope for.
Love, your best friend,
Emma.

I felt a sigh escape my lips as my eyes closed, exhaustion hitting me in the face like a truck. Give me a break, okay? It's damn hard to sleep properly on the floor of a cellar with God knows how many broken bones. The pain was numbing, I'd felt it for so long. I was pretty sure some of the bones would heal themselves in the wrong way, but I didn't care. I was pretty sure there was more pain to come, considering how many times Damien had threatened my murder.

Days had turned into weeks, I was sure of it. I wasn't certain of exactly how many days, because the light barely ever came through the cellar so that I could try to see what time of day it was. Whatever my kidnappers were planning, I wasn't sure of. But it wasn't going to be pleasant, so when I was laid there alone in the darkness, I tried to think of how lucky I was to still only be dealing with the pain of my broken bones, since I was sure when they killed me the pain would be much worse.

Everytime I opened my mouth to speak in the presence of Damien, he would start to rant about another way he could kill me. Strangle, suffocate, stab, shoot, and the last of all? He told me he would drain my body of every last drop of blood. I had burst into tears then, crawling as far away from him as I could get, my body quaking with the fear his horrible voice had inflicted on me.

I wanted it to be over. I wanted them to kill me, just to get it over with. But it didn't look like they planned to do that yet, so until they did, I was stuck writing letters to Jake in my head, imagining what I would say to him.

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I'm kind of curious to see how this chapter will go down, you know. Maybe you'll love it, because of the letter - WHICH, BY THE WAY, SHE IS MAKING UP IN HER HEAD AND SHE NEVER ACTUALLY SENT ANYTHING TO JAKE - but maybe you'll be annoyed because there's no action. But, stick with me. If I don't show how Emma is dealing with all of this, then it's a pretty rubbish storyline.

Next chapter we'll be back to Jacob, I think, and he's getting closer to figuring it out. :)

Also, can I just say; WE GOT 1000 READS! Maybe that doesn't seem like a lot but holy hell it makes me excited, so thank you so so so much!

Aaaaaaand this chapter is written for my bestie on Instagram. I love you, so damn much, and have a happy happy birthday. I'm hoping this will be okay as a gift even if it's pretty crappy, because I had wanted to include Embry in it for you and I can't, and I also can't actually get you a real gift. But there WILL BE - I promise you this - an 'Embry Chapter' coming up soon. But I'll say again - I love you, you're incredible, and one of the loveliest people I know.

- Author