Broken pieces (Lesbian Love Story)

Another let down

Chapter 13: Another Let Down

She agreed to come here today. It feels as if I've been waiting for hours. Maybe because I'm impatient at the moment. I sat back in my seat and I began to tap my right foot on the ground repeatedly. I could hear the chatter of the girls behind me as They scattered around trying to finish up their chores for the day. I made sure that I finished my chores early so that I'd have enough time to speak to Sonia.

The second attempt. I need to see my brother again. I'm desperate.

I'm willing to go through just about anything to see him. I refuse to give up on him and loose him permanently. I miss him. He's the only family I have left.

Those people probably aren't even treating him right. He's probably suffering right now. He's just a kid, he needs me, his family.

I took a deep breath and tried to calm my mind.

There was a light knock on the door. That has to be her. I stood up from the couch and made my way to the door. This time has to go way better then the last. She has to understand that I stormed out on her the first time due to anger and being upset. I took another deep breath before turning the knob. I closed my eyes and took another second to calm. I opened them unlocked the knob and pulled the door open.

" hello " I greeted.
" hi " she responded. " come on in" I moved from in front of the door so that she can walk in. As she made her way in her back heels clattered on the wooden floor. She started to unbutton her blazer and she slid it off . " may I? " she asked pointing to the coat hooks on the wall. " oh yes ofcourse" I said quickly.

She placed it down on the hook neatly. " follow me " I said turning around and making my way to the couch. From the clatter of her heels I could tell that she was following closely behind.

I sat down facing her way and she did the same.

" would you like anything to drink? " I asked. I felt hesitant and nervous. I didn't know how to start.

" no thank you " she smiled. Her thin pale lips were disguised by the bloody red lipstick she had on.

I opened my mouth then closed it again. Undecided whether I should speak again. I should just get right to the point. I'm waisting time. " I uh wanted to apologize for storming out the last time you were here " I sighed.

" no don't worry about it, you've had it really rough these past days. I understand" she straightened the wrinkles on her skirt.

"Ok so there's this job hiring and I was wondering that once I turn 18 and I save up enough money and I get my own place would I be able to get custody of Anthony" I asked.

" Sarah it's not that easy" she sighed.

" I know it's not that easy, but I'm willing to try and willing to do my best" I defended.

" taking care of Anthony isn't only about providing him a stable place to stay Sarah. it's about being able to get him to and from school everyday, being able to prepare food to eat for him everyday, watching his health with doctor visits, providing him with clothes as he gets older" she said slowly.

" I can do that. I know I can" I said

" who will watch him while your at work Sarah" she asked. " I feel like you jumped into this way to quick, without giving it any thought" she added before I was allowed to answer.

" and let's just say that you did start the job and you finally turned eighteen and you went to court excited that you might get custody of your brother and then the judge starts to ask you questions about your living conditions and your transportation and how your going to be able to provide this and that" she moved her hand around to make her point.

" tell me who do you think he's going to pick, the married couple with a husband that has a very stable job a car a nice home and a wife who's a stay at home mother, or the eighteen your old that has barely enough money to get by on her own. They have two children of there own Sarah so they already have the experience" Every word was like a punch to the face.

Every punch making me feel worthless. I didn't speak. I couldn't. I felt so defeated in a way. I was so excited at the thought of seeing him again, that I didn't think it through.

" I'm sorry to be such a let down once again but I have to be completely honest with you, I can't set you up to take part in a fight that I know you won't win. Talk to mrs.Jefferson and see if there's a way that you can go back to school and finish your last year " she rubbed my shoulder lightly.

" It's time that you take care of yourself . Get that job, save money. For you Sarah, for you.
For college. remember your able to stay here until your twenty and your on your feet, it's not going to be easy but you'll get through all of this. Your strong" she removed her hand from my shoulder.

I still didn't speak it's like my mouth was glued shut.
" just think about that Sarah, I'm being hard on you because I know what's right and trying to get custody of your brother, isn't it. I'll tell you this, I'll try my best to at least get you one visit with him so that you can say bye but that's all I can do" she stood up from the couch.

" think about it Sarah and call me if you need anything else" she walked to where her blazer was hanging and she grabbed it. She slid it on. She took one more glance at me then walked out of the door.

" I'm not good with goodbyes " I whispered