Is My "BLACK" Beautiful?

"I'm Not Coming!"

NARRATOR

No one was home. Rakim got to his room and he tried his hardest but he couldn't stop crying.

He was mad at Harlem but mostly he was mad at the forces that brought them together.

Before she came he was fine. He didn't have a girl friend and he was fine living his life like a normal human being.

He hated to argue but they couldn't seem not to. It was too much at this point.

Why would his soulmate be her? See he knew she was meant for him that was obvious there was this type of connection he'd never experienced. There was no indication that they'd ever grow out of this senseless fighting.

He loved her completely and with everything he had. At 17 he knew that she was his whole heart.

She was just too stubborn. She didn't like to share her emotions and he did. She made him want to anyways. He cried because he could never get her to fully trust him in that way. She was so shut in her own head sometimes. Love made his heart open to her, he showed her all his scars and let the whole wall down for her and yet and still she was still building her own.

He was trying to reverse 16 years of solitude she had established. This wasn't something she did she was uber sensitive and that's just who he had fallen in love with.

He stared at his tarp covered wall and cried even more.

Suddenly his father walked in the wondering what was wrong.

"What's wrong baby boy?"

He asked walking in and sitting next to Rakim on the floor.

Rakim rubbed his eyes and wiped the tears away.

"Nah I'm cool pops it just fumes from the graffiti."

"Nah none of that macho shit. You haven't done graffiti a minute unless it's touching up what ever it is under that tarp. Plus you for sure not getting paint on that fit."

Rakim shook his head like it was nothing.

"Tears aren't gender specific Rakim. I know you might feel like you a man and you shouldn't cry but not crying see that's what makes men lash out like I did when I was younger."

Rakim could appreciate and very much understood what his father was saying but it changed nothing for him. The person he loved didn't trust him enough and he had done everything he could think of to reassure her that he could be trusted.

HARLEM's HOUSE

HARLEM

I waited for all our friends to arrive. In the meantime I sat in my room. Chicago was doing her hair in two buns.

"Hey Chi."

"What's good?"

I thought about changing the subject for a quick second but didn't.

"Rakim he said I should tell you something about me . That I should talk to you about it and no one really knows this about me except my family and him. Your like my sister now though so I think I can tell you."

"Four years ago today I was ..."

She sat there looking at me with the most blank expression. She looked very patient in that moment just waiting for me to expose myself. She couldn't be this easy to speak to.

All the intimidating things about her were gone. She was family.

"Four years today I was um raped."