The past is the past. A saying humans have lived by for...as long as I know. People always fear what it is. what thy have done in the past. What happens in the past effects the future. And that is true. Every tomorrow comes from a yesterday. Everyone gets hung up on the past. I know I do.
I always think about what happened. I think about what I did. About what has happened to me. Everything I did, everything others did. I sometimes yearn for the past. The days wen I didn't have to worry about everything and everyone. Sometimes I wish i could stay in those days forever.
With my best fiends from preschool and kindergarten. The way we could just play pretend for hours and not worry about what others would think. How I miss those days and how I miss them. Now they're all gone. I never thought I'd lose them. And I never thought I'd have to say goodbye.
But time goes on. Washing away their existence in my life. Or the scenes of our crimes. Some people do unspeakable things. Taking advantage of other people. It's horrible to think about. And I don't like think about those things, but sometimes they still find a way in my mind. I can be a very serious person at times.
And I'm an what some people call an empath. I'm someone who can feel other people's pain and emotions. My friends can all tell you how depressed I get sometimes. It's really weird. I could be perfectly happy and them I get quiet and sad.
After awhile my friends notice and ask me what's wrong. I say nothing. And that's because I don't know what's wrong. I can always tell when someone's upset. I'm just like that. And when I was younger I never understood what was happening or why. Then one day I figured it out.
I was hanging out with one of my friends and a wave of sorrow washed over me. I didn't know why and then I looked at my friend. He was sitting there quietly, just there. He was usually always trying to make me laugh and happy....He was just so not him.
I studied him really hard and then said what's wrong. He looked shocked and confused. Then he told me something, something I promised never to repeat. But I can say it was depressing. It wasn't anything lik murder or rape, but it was upsetting. And as he was telling me the story, I felt his sadness. After that I looked up what it was called empathy.
I'm a naturally curious person, so I did a little research. All this time I was feeling other people's feelings. I was shocked...and scared. I didn't want to feel their pain. I didn't want to feel any pain.
The past haunts us. Whether it be good or bad. What we do effects who we become. What other people do effect who we become. How they treat us. What they do to us. How they use us.
Some people are cold, heartless, monsters. They do unspeakable things. That cause everything to change. And what they do...it only benefits them. I don't like thinking about it. I don't like thinking about what kinds of monsters are ou there...
The scariest thing to me, is knowing. Knowing that there are people out there, and they could be anyone....
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Author's Note
Life is...it's...impossible to explain. It's everything we need and sometimes everything we don't. It's scary. It's hard to understand. It's...life.
It confuses me. And it scares me. Life is terrifying. Whenever I think about it, sometimes I...I just lose it. The world is a scary place. And it scares me sometimes....
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A little bit of wisdom
RandomA book about how I truly feel. About things that have to be said, but people are too scared to say. About the real things in life. It's not some made up story. It's true feelings that come from the heart. Nothing more, nothing less. But you might no...
