How to become popular

Chapter 7

What can I do to get through to her? What can I do?

I’m sitting at my desk and trying to make some sort of plan how I could manage to talk to Anny.

I really like it to plan things, to think of how to do something. And I’m actually not too bad. But this one is difficult.

She won’t phone back and won’t text me back. So there is only one thing left that I could do: I have to go over to her house and then I can just hope that her mum will let me in.

It’s hard to imagine how her mum would react. I could say that I know her pretty well because I spend so much time with Anny, normally. And she’s kind of difficult. I mean she is really nice but exactly this is the problem.

She could have promised to her daughter that she won’t let anyone in when Anny doesn’t want it. Or she would let me in because she wants that her daughter is feeling better.

It’s hard to say.

But I think I just have to go for it. That’s the only thing I have.

I will just go over now. I really have to know what she’s up to.

How would I feel after such a thing that had happened to her? I would probably kill myself or something. And I have actually no idea what Anny would do or better what she is doing.

So I have to check on her and see if she’s alright.

I force myself to stop thinking about it and to just take my things to go over to her.

~

The whole week I did nothing.

There is just nothing to do, is there?

The only thing I kind of did is that I have decided that I won’t do it anymore. I won’t even try it.

It was a stupid idea of my stupid friend. She shouldn’t have let my start such a thing. She’s not really what you would call a best friend if she let something like this happen to me.

That is what I did.

I thought about it over and over again, lying on my bed and staring at the ceiling. Some days I lay there for hours without moving at all.

I also came to the conclusion that I hate everyone. I knew before that I hate Cecelia and her crew but I kind of got along with some of the people but now... Now I hate everyone. There is no way to say that you like someone or only get along with someone who did such a thing to you. That is impossible.

And then Amber: She was my best friend or better she always pretended to be my best friend.

But as I said before: What best friend would do something like this? The answer is that no best friend would do it.

Another thing I did was being on “facebook”.

I read every entry of her, saw every picture of her and read Cecelia’s profile more than twice a day. And I did the same with all the other persons I know who had to do with this... thing that happened in class.

That’s it. That’s what I did for a week.

The day after the incident in class I also had a conversation with my mum because I thought it would be kind of unfair if I wouldn’t talk to her at all. Also I needed to talk to her because I didn’t want to go to school and I can’t only tell her that I don’t want to. I wouldn’t get the form for my absence from her if she wouldn’t know the reasons.

Nevertheless I didn’t tell her the whole truth.

I only told her that everyone was laughing at me and hustling me, short: That they were bullying me. But I also told her that I have no idea why they did it.