Close Your Eyes (Part 5: Bruce Banner)

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When Bruce was transformed into the Hulk, he always kept his distance from you, his fear of hurting you beyond anything else going through his mind during a mission. He knew that you could handle yourself just as expertly as anyone else on the team, so he had no concerns with your ability to do so; his only fear was from himself. It was a fear that was soon to be realized.

"Bruce, look at me. You know that I love you, right?"

When Bruce was transformed into the Hulk, his mind wasn't fully his own, and it terrified him with each time that the beast took over. There was so much anger and rage that filled his mind and every nerve in his massive body that it was difficult to control, even as a part of his own persona. He knew who you were, and even the Hulk knew what you meant to his alter ego, but the thoughts were always just a bit clouded.

"You're not a monster, Bruce."

When Bruce was transformed into the Hulk, he could almost hold you in one hand, encompassing you with the sheer size of it. The strength in his hand alone could crush you if he wanted to, but when you were within it, it was always gentle and careful to not push too hard. The Hulk knew the fragility of a human body, and treated you as if you were glass beneath his touch because you were the most important thing to the Bruce side of himself, so you were important to him too.

"Hulk is very sorry."

When Bruce was transformed into the Hulk, he was an exposed nerve, just as he had said. Every emotion bubbled to the surface and exploded from him, sometimes terrifying even himself as much as it did the team around him. When he saw pain in someone close to him, he felt it too. When he saw joy, he tried to understand and be a part of it, because it wasn't something that the Hulk knew. But when he saw someone that he loved die, there was no coming back from it; the anger and rage would never stop, and the transformation back to Bruce might not ever happen again.

"I forgive you too, Big Guy."

Even when Bruce was transformed into the Hulk, he felt your body die in his hands. He was screaming in the far reaches of the Hulk's mind, trying to transform back but the beast wouldn't allow him to. The pain was too much, and the Hulk was trying to protect him from a hurt that could destroy them both; he was always trying to protect Bruce, even when he fought back. Even when all Bruce wanted was one more chance to feel your skin with his own and to say goodbye to you as himself, the Hulk denied him.

"Bruce, run"

When Bruce was transformed into the Hulk, the team was at their highest alert, and when the Hulk lost his control, there were protocols in place to take him down. When he was out of control, destruction followed him wherever he went, and there was no regard to who he hurt in the process. His teammates were nothing but intrusions and obstructions in his path that had to be moved or eliminated; they knew this and were prepared, but in this instance it was the last thing that any of them wanted to do. They knew he was suffering and only wanted to help, even though each of them would never admit openly that they blamed him for your death just as much as he blamed himself.

So that they wouldn't hurt anyone else, and with the love of their life gone by their own hand, both Bruce and the Hulk ran, just as you had asked them to do with your final words. They ran until the voices of the team yelling after them were long gone, and until even Tony couldn't keep up as he pushed his suit to its limits. They ran until they couldn't run anymore, finally giving in to the reality of what had happened on their final mission with the team, the last time they would see you, and the last time that anyone would ever see either of them again.  

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