Clarity || z.m

Hopeless

Sorry for the wait, guys! I had a lot of stuff to do this weekend. I was also going to update last night, but I was ridiculously tired. I fell asleep at like 8:30 PM. :o

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE 40k READS! That's literally unreal for me. This chapter's pretty short.

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“M-my aunt?” I stuttered, practically paralyzed. I stuttered. My heart was on the floor, and it was for no good reason at all. The confusion of not knowing whether to feel sad or angry was my only thought.

“I know this is a lot for you to take in, Nani. I was just as young as you, just a bit older when your mom left you & Mason. You both have been on my mind lately, and I just wanted to see if you were in Windsor Valley.”  Avalon took a few steps closer, making me take a few steps back, still not feeling comfortable.

“Well, we’re here, and we’re doing great. You can go ahead and let Beth know that,” I muttered bitterly, gripping onto my purse tightly, attempting to walk away from her before the conversation went any further than I wanted it to. I have a lot to say to my mom, but I wasn’t going to take the anger out on somebody else for her mistakes.

She sighed, almost defeated that she couldn’t get through my hard head. “When your mom left, it just wasn’t you she abandoned. No one has talked to her in 10 years.” Dead in my tracks, I stopped, my heart falling once more. She caught my attention, all of this time. “She –she knew people would talk about what she did & she knew our parents wouldn’t approve of her choices. I’m just as angry as you are with her. She left her family behind. Just like you had to grow up without your mom, I grew up without my older sister.”

Anger built up inside of me, I closed my eyes, trying to find some sort of inner peace, but failed miserably. “Don’t you dare compare you growing up without a sister to me growing up without a mom. You had my grandma around as you grew up, I didn’t have Beth! I had to learn things on my own. Where were you all ten years ago when we had nobody? If my grandparents say that my mom had left them behind too, where were they?”

The bad part about us just being about the same age meant that we’d clash more and we wouldn’t be rational. I prepared myself for a fight, and it looked like she did as well, taking deep breaths before she replied. “I was still too young to understand. My mom didn’t tell me the full story until I was about 17. My parents saw that it hurt too much to be around them, so we gave Elijah his space. It was nothing personal. My mom talks about you & Mason every single day, and all she can picture are little 8 & 11 year old kids because she hasn’t seen you in years!”

Avalon was just as gorgeous as my mom, it scared me. She had the exact same light-up-your day smile, perfect complexion and deep dimples. Unlike my mom, she had fiery red hair like my grandma did. “You really haven’t spoken to my mom?”

She shook her head, as if she was the one who she felt guilty. As much as I didn’t want to blame her, it was all too painful looking at her. It was like life had been giving me a constant reminder lately that my mom wasn’t around and she never would be again.