Thirty- Five

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The next morning is a blur. I feel like I have the worst hangover ever, which is weird since I did not drink at all last night. I quickly showered and bandaged my wrists, then packed up my stuff. I make sure to wear a long sleeve shirt to cover my bandaged wrists.

The voice is quiet this morning. I try not to think so much about it, I'm just glad that it's not so loud.

Making sure to put Death's ring in my pocket, I decide to head back to the Winchesters. When I get back to the motel room that they are staying in, I just stand in front of the door, unsure of how they will react to my wrists being bandaged up or that I got Death's ring.

The door opens and Dean is standing there. He sighs in relief and wraps his arms around me, pulling me into a tight hug. This surprises me, and it takes me a moment to realize that I am allowed to hug him back. By that time, he's pulling away, and I feel extremely guilty for leaving. His relieved expression quickly turns to anger.

"Where the hell were you?" He asks. I pull the ring out of my pocket and hand it to him. He looks at it, amazement crossing his features. "Is this Death's ring?" I nod.

"He was wearing it," I mutter as I shut the door and go inside the room. Sam is at the table with his laptop open and Layla is sprawled out on the bed watching TV. "Where's the other two?" I ask, a small bit of worry forming in my stomach at the absence of my brother.

"They went to eat," she replies, and I roll my eyes as I hear the looney tunes theme song playing. "They made me stay here and babysit." I smile a little when I see Sam roll his eyes at her comment. Suddenly, I remember all the stuff that Death said. The smile falls from my face and I realize I have to tell Dean.

"Hey, Riley?" I turn around and Dean motions for me to come out in the hallway. I nod and follow him, shutting the motel room door to give us some privacy. "Okay. What's the deal with this?" He holds up the ring, and I tilt my head to the side, confused. "Don't tell me he just gave this to you out of the goodness of his heart."

"Look, he wants Lucifer slammed back in the box as much as we do, okay?" When I notice that Dean is listening, I continue. "But, I had to agree to some things before he gave it to me."

"Like?" I sigh deeply.

"Like, we have to do whatever it takes to put Lucifer back in the cage."

"Yeah, wasn't that the original plan?" He looks confused.

"Dean, you know what we have to do," I say, getting serious. "You have to let Sam jump in the cage with Lucifer." Dean opens his mouth to say something, but immediately closes it again. "Come on, Dean. I know this sucks, but it's the right thing to do. And I know it's all about you two keeping each other alive—believe me, I know— but we're talking about the devil here." He looks at me for a moment, taking in my words. "It's either your brother's life or billions of lives," I add, trying to be convincing.

"Yeah, I guess you're right," he says. "I hate that," he mutters, wiping a hand across his face. We stand there awkwardly for a few seconds, before I say something else.

"Hey, my brother died, and he came back," I say. Dean lowers his eyebrows as if trying to figure out my point. "Sam's died, you've died, Cas died. Always remember that in this line of business, death doesn't always mean goodbye." With that, I step back inside the motel room, leaving Dean in the hallway to think over everything I just said.

"You dyed your hair?" Layla questions as I step into the room. I give her a weird look and go over to the fridge, pulling out a Mountain Dew. "It looks badass." I roll my eyes and sit down across from Sam.

"Why did you go off by yourself?" He asks, knitting his eyebrows together. I tilt my head to the side questioningly and take his laptop. He tries to stop me, and I can see why. When I glance at the laptop screen, there is a page opened up about anxiety. I shut it, pinching the bridge of my nose. He knows. Dean probably knows, too.

"I- I don't know," I stammer, feeling my hands start to shake again. I quickly hide them under the table and out of Sam's view. "I just thought— well, you guys always have a full plate and I was trying to help." I felt nearly impossible to keep my voice steady, so I try to wrap it up quickly.

"You did," he says. "And believe me, we're very grateful, but you have to let us help you." I raise my eyebrows. "And not just with hunting, but with your other problem."

"Problem? What problem? I don't have a problem." The words come out of my mouth way too fast. "You're the one with the problem if you think that I have a problem," I stammer, feeling my face heat up a little.

"Jeez, take a chill pill," Layla murmurs, switching the tv channel. I roll my eyes as Sam takes his laptop back. We look up as the door opens and Dean, Jasper, and Dylan walk in the room. I glance up at my brother. He refuses to talk to me, or even look at me. I notice that he's carrying a plastic bag in his hand. He walks by the table without a word. I look down at my hands, my heart falling since he's still ignoring me.

"Shouldn't some of us get another room? It's going to be awfully crowded in here," Jasper says.

"Yeah, that's probably a good idea," Dean says.  "Let's go. Come on, Sam." I can easily see that they are trying to leave me alone with Dylan, so we can work things out. Sam closes his laptop and stands up. I give him a look and he shrugs, following them out of the room.

It's quiet in the room for a few minutes, until Dylan sits down at the table across from me and hands me the plastic bag in his hands. I take it hesitantly and look inside.

"I felt like an ass for leaving it like that," he starts as I look through the stuff. "I know that this hardly makes up for it, but..." he trails off. I laugh as I pull out a giant plush doll of Marvin the Martian. He was my favorite character from Looney Tunes when I was a kid.

"Well, it's a start," I say, smiling. He smiles back and continues talking as I look through the bag. There's a Def Leppard CD, season four of Friends on DVD, and a bunch of little things.

"I was just thinking, if this situation were reversed, you would be at my side whenever I needed you. And when I think about that, I start thinking about—" I know exactly where he is going with this, so I cut him off.

"Hey, you're a great brother, okay?" I say. "You always were." I continue looking through the stuff, rolling my eyes when I see a yo-yo in the bag. "And even if you did try to help, I probably would have just pushed you away, anyways. I mean, you know how I am." When he doesn't respond, I look up at him. He has a look on his face that is full of concern and worry. "I have it under control, okay? I swear, I'll be fine."

"You always say that."

*****

I'm sorry this chapter was really short, but I wanted to update. Hopefully, this story will only have a couple chapters left. I was planning on writing a sequel, but this one took me forever and i have plans for other stories. So I may not write a second one.

—M

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