Unable To Love//Lucaya

•9•

Lucas was now in the OR. The nurse came out and told me that he was in surgery and there wasn't a very large chance that he would make it. I cried again until I couldn't anymore. She talked to me again once I was more stable and told me that he had broken ribs, a cracked skull, a couple broken bones, and internal bleeding. Not to long after she left, a police officer came in to talk to me about what happened. She asked if I was ready to talk to her about what I saw. I said okay just so that I could get it off my chest. I told her that I walked in to Lucas's dad kicking him. I said that I hit him with the lamp out of panick, and that I didn't mean for it to happen. She was very nice. You could tell that she was being cautious toward my emotions so that I didn't break down again. She said thank you to me and left.

I was sitting in that uncomfortable hospital chair for 4 hours before my mom called. I had told her about what happened. She said she was working (shocker) and that she was sorry that she couldn't be here to comfort me. I said it was okay and she said that she knew it wasn't. She also said that she would call when she was on her way to the hospital.

"Hey, mom" I said, my voice so quiet that I could barely hear myself.

"Hey, sweetie. I'm on my way to pick you up."

What? "No."

"Honey you can't stay the-"

"I can stay for as long as I want. I'm not leaving until I know that he is okay."

"Honey."

"He is going to be okay. I know he is. He is going to pull through. He's strong. He will fight until he breaks through... He won't let go." I said the last part just below a whisper. I couldn't even hear it myself. I wasn't even sure if I was speaking out loud or in my head. I couldn't speak anymore. I was just so tired that I couldn't even process what I was doing anymore. My arm went limp and I dropped my phone. My head went limp and I let it fall. I fell to the floor and everything went black.

***

I woke up in a bed. A hospital bed. I knew what had happened but I didn't care. I was going to see if he was okay. I stood up and wripped the IV out of my arm. It started to bleed a little but I just put the band aid back on it and kept walking. I walked out towards the waiting room, where a nurse stopped me.

"Miss you're not supposed to be out of bed."

"I don't care, I'm fine. Where is Lucas?"

"He is still in the OR. They said that there is little to no chance that he will make it out. I'm sorry."

"No."

"Excuse me?"

"No. I refuse to believe that. He will make it out alive. I know he will."

"Ma'am I think you should go back to sleep. We will wake you when his procedure is over."

"How can I sleep when I know that he is suffering? What time is it?"

"4:30am"

It was 10:00 when the incident happened.

"Your mother arrived about an hour ago. She said that she would take you home when we could release you. So if you would let me run some tests then you can be free to go home."

"Tell her to leave. I'm staying. I don't want to go home. I will go back to my hospital bed. Tell her that if she wants to wait for me then that's fine, but that means that she is also waiting for Lucas."

"Okay miss. Now go back to your room."

"Thank you."

I walked back to my room and tried to sleep. It took me a little but I finally did.

I woke up to someone calling my name.

"Maya."

"What?"

"Maya, it's about Lucas."

Lucas? Lucas!

I shot up in the bed.

"What happened? Is he okay?"

"He is out of surgery."

"Is he okay?"

"He is stable, but only temporarily. We woke you up because you don't have long until we take him off of life support."

My heart dropped to my stomach. "What?"

"The hospital can't afford to keep him on life support anymore. Since all of his money belongs to his father, we asked him if he would keep paying for it. He said to take him off and let nature take its course. I'm sorry."

"No! There has to be another way! Please tell me he doesn't have to go?!?"

"I'm sorry miss but you can go and see him now if you like."

Without another word I stood up and left the room. The nurse told me he was in 465B. I went to his room and slowly walked in. Tears slid down my cheeks as soon as I saw him. He was so badly bruised and bandaged with many machines hooked up to him. I ran to his side and grabbed his hand sweezing it lightly, tears streaming down my face.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. You shouldn't have to go through this. You're only 18 years old. You don't deserve to die. You are the only person that I ever loved. And I never even got to tell you that. It just came to me actually, that I love you. I was just thinking about all of my decisions. All the choices I made. It all added up. I love you, Lucas Friar, and I will always remember you. I kissed hind hand then stood up to kiss his cheek. I sat down in the chair next to his bed, still holding his hand, as the doctors came in and turned the machine off. I started crying again. I just cried and cried again. I couldn't stop crying. It was just me and him. His lifeless body just sitting there. Helpless. I couldn't stop thinking about how this would affect my life. I wouldn't ever be able to love again. I will be known as the girl who is not able to love. I slowly ran out of tears before I stood up to leave. I kissed his hand one last time before I felt a twitch. I figured it was just my imagination when he didn't move a muscle. I wiped away a tear and went to leave before I heard something.

"Maya?" It was so quiet that I almost missed it. But it was loud enough to make me whip around and run to his bedside.

"Lucas?"

"It hurts."

That broke my heart, more than it already was. I hated seeing him in pain.

"I know it does. But you're okay. And that's all that matters right now."

I pressed the button on his bedside that called the nurse. She came in and said "are you ready to leave him?" She asked staring at her clipboard. She looked up and froze. "Oh my god!"

"Oh my god indeed! Its a miracle!" I called.

"It really is! Doctor!" The nurse ran out of the room.

"You almost gave that lady a heart attack." I paused. "I'm so glad your okay."

~~~

Okay, so I hoped that you liked the chapters! I decided to update early because why not?

~Lola