Witch Sister Three and TMNT *EDITING*

30- There Is Only...The War (Kylee)

I couldn’t have them know how tired I was lately. I didn’t want them to see how stiff I was, or how uncomfortable it was to move. My pride wouldn’t allow that, I don’t need Tomoyo and Mark’s worry or sympathy.  It doesn’t help anyone and distracts us from our job. Our patrol missions would be slowed because they’d force me to ‘take it easy’. We get slower and then Shredder starts to question us, deciding on whether or not we’re useful to him anymore, and I can’t exactly say I want to be in a room with Mother’s father again-alone or with my team.

Nightmare makes his presence in the tower known, if he’s with me or not-the partier loves striking fear or surprise in almost everyone. He takes most joy in tormenting me. Calling me “Meat”, he throws me against walls, drains me of energy and whispers things. I haven’t truly slept in this time, he stays up, sits beside me, and tells me things in that haunted voice of his. Things that keep me up at night. Of course he can’t do this all of the time-I need my energy for Shredder’s use and his meals. The best sleep I get is a nap in the middle of the day while I’m shamefully trying to hide from him. My team has kept up with my slowing pace, but I can’t tell them what’s really going on. How tight chested I’ve been feeling or vulnerable. I know Tomoyo suspect’s somethings going on, the way he watches me walk into a room, how he steps in when Nightmare’s cornered me and I’m trying to look indifferent. Frankly-Mark’s too creeped out by the demon to notice all too much-not like he’s neglectful or anything; lately when I’m short breathed and low on energy during our patrols and too my every rebuttal and complaint he’ll slow down or throw me on his back. My team’s trying, but they don’t quite know. I don’t want them to.

What if they draw the conclusion that I’m some sort of monster? If they knew where Nightmare had come from, what would they think of me? A demon placed inside a little girl and it’s been there for years, all the sudden just to come out when Shredder needs it most? It….I….I’m afraid maybe they’ll leave because I might be trouble or…something else-I DON’T KNOW! I don’t even quite understand my situation anymore either, so until I do, I don’t want Tomoyo or Mark knowing. Maybe I never want them to know the deeper link between the beast and myself.

                I take a deep, withered breath as I close my locker. It was a long night last night and I hadn’t gotten much sleep. After patrols, I tried to crash in Bec and my quarters; my sister wasn’t there again, and the minute I hit the bed, I nearly passed out till Nightmare decided to play with my brain for a while before taking his nightly meal.  Even with the sleep I got after that-I’m exhausted and stiff. I guess it’s getting used to producing enough energy for two creatures now that’s got me worn. I have to keep myself functional while feeding Nightmare involuntarily. It’s a full time job on top of another. I can see in the locker mirror that I’m starting to get bags under my eyes. I frown, thinking on how pathetic I’ve become already, and close my locker. “Reggie?” I ask the girl next to me, turning to face her.  She looks at me sadly. “Where was Rebecca last night? She wasn’t in our quarters when I came back from patrols.” Part of me wanted to say home, but the other part of me spat out the idea. I could never come remotely close to calling this place home.

“She was working late again. Spent all night near the monitor, typing something.” Regina’s eyes looked sympathetic as she closed her own locker. “I guess the Master is just keeping her busy. Don’t worry-we’ll make sure she gets some sleep in today.” Then she walked away. I sighed miserably. It’s not what I wanted, but I guess I have to be happy with it…I get that she’s busy now, and I’m glad she’s doing something that she can really sink her teeth into. Becca needs that much; something to keep her occupied and happy. I don’t mind that she’s busy, I enjoy that she has this. I miss having her around though. Having that company of someone as close to me as my twin, especially when the fear of Nightmare always feeding on me, I could use the one person I consider my strength.