Behind My Blue Eyes

Chapter 14

Chapter 14

He gave me a teddy bear and nodded at Kylie.
"You look beautiful today." He kissed her cheek as she stood like a statue. "Tell her why I'm angry, infuriated, with you." Kylie just looked between me and dad and he sighed.
"A few months before your mom found out that she was sick, I got a new boss and she was um," he swallowed. "Interested in me and your mom and I had been having some problems in our marriage and I took what she offered." "And what exactly did she offer, Dad?" Her voice was ice.

I didn't want to witness this; how heartbroken Kylie will become.
"She offered me a no string attached... sexual... relationship."
"Oh my god," Kylie took several steps away from him like he was a plague. Now that he is reaching out for us, we are pulling back when less than 48 hours, it was the opposite. 
"It's over. It's over now."
"What do you mean it's over now?" Kylie asked.
"You continued to see her after mom's death? You didn't break up with her until recently? You lied to us all these years, you left us for her."
"I know. I'm so sorry. I couldn't let her go after everything and I couldn't face you guys."
"Just because you are here now, doesn't make you a hero." She walked past him purposely knocking her shoulder with his and left the room. The silence was suffocating and then Aiden walked in. "Hey, Jen I'm so glad that you're okay-" Then he stopped.
"What's he doing here?"
"Aiden, I apologize for everything I said last night and previous nights. I take all your words into consideration. I'm so sorry for everything."
"You're not sorry that you fucked that lady while mom was sick."
My eyes widened. He knew?
"How? How do you know about that?" "You should've been more careful about who you met at my soccer games when I was younger. Mom needed you, we needed you, and I needed you. You want to know why I drank and started to do drugs? Because that was my way of saying fuck you. And I can't believe you never noticed that I was acting out for your attention. And now, I realize, I was becoming you. After Kat's funeral, I'm going to rehab to get clean and you are going to pay for it if you ever want me in your life again."
"Okay, son. Okay."
"Now, I would like to talk to Jennie, alone. And Tess should be on her way over and you have to tell her the truth about everything. She's your favorite after all." Dad walked out the door.

It was true though. Tessa had always been in Dad's heart more than us. She did everything she could to be the best child, grades, boys, clothes. The pressure to be perfect was put on her since Aiden was born. She had to be that authority figure for her three younger siblings, and I don't think she ever realized that. I was the glue, but Tess was the biggest piece.

Aiden pulled up a chair. "You knew?" I asked. He shrugged, a fire burning in his blue eyes.
"When did you find out?" He asked me.
"Last night and I didn't know how little I actually knew about our dad." "Sometimes when we she was close to her end, I thought that she had known about Dad. I had a feeling that she knew all along, but she didn't say anything about him except forgive your father for his mistakes when I said I was mad at him. She wrote that in her letter addressed to me. I just can't help, but feel like he used her. He used all of us. Mom was so sick and he was out sleeping with his boss. Then the moment she's gone, he acted as if she was left to take of us. We don't deserve this. She never deserved that."
"You never deserved the pain of knowing."
"Yeah, I guess. But I'd rather have known than not. Believe it or not, I'm almost less pissed off just because he had some reason to actually leave us. I just wish he would've dumped the skank's ass as soon as he found out how sick Mom was."
"I just hope she's looking down at us and likes what she sees."
"She would definitely love you."
"You too, bro." He hugged me. It hurt, but they loving gesture overpowered the pain. "I'm going to go see if I can find Kylie."